Chapter 9: Natalia

Mikhail’s honey-colored eyes and the gold hoop in his ear are the only touch of color on him, along with the red cross on his left hand and the red writing on his other hand. Everything else is like a dark shadow billowing around him.

Every step he takes makes my heart gallop, and I need to take slow breaths to calm myself. The worst thing I can look now is afraid.

Mikhail says something to the dog in Russian, and it bounds over to him. He lowers to tap its head, then straightens up and returns his focus on me.

“Didn’t think I’d find you out here playing with my sister’s dog,” he states, looking from me to the dog.

It’s his sister’s. That explains why it has a gentler presence.

“I was just … well, I came out here when I saw it. And it was snowing. I’ve never seen snow before.”

“Snow,” he says, and the dog barks. “That’s her name.”

“Oh,” I breathe and gaze at the beautiful dog. The name is fitting even now as I watch the snowflakes mingle with the dog’s fur.

I wonder what his sister was like. The only thing about her I know, apart from the way she died, is that she owned this dog and now it’s his.

Another command in Russian has Snow running back down the path where I’d originally seen her. I want to ask if the dog just roams the grounds, but that’s a question for normal people. Clearly, the dog is fine. I am not.

As I gaze into those eyes of his, I wonder what he’s going to do to me now.

Is he going to make good on his word to fuck me?

Will he hurt me when he does?

I don’t know if I could bear it. I don’t think I could go through such violence and make it back with my mind already so fragile.

So, what do I do to make it easier? I can’t think of anything.

“Relax, Malyshka. I don’t plan to fuck you out here in the snow for all to see,” he begins and leans so close to my ear he envelopes me with his aftershave. “Unless you want me to.”

My cheeks heat up at his words, and the images of him taking me right here flicker through my mind, but I manage to gather my composure.

“No,” I reply, and he smiles.

“I have business to attend to, but I came to give you the good news.”

“What good news?” I’m not sure what shape that would take for me in regard to him.

“The doctor says you’re clean, and it seems like your contraceptive injection meets my criteria, so you won’t require any further medication.”

What an asshole.

His smile irritates me so much I can’t hold my tongue.

“Did you have to do that to me?” I ask.

“Do what? I like to fuck bareback and without the worry of impregnating my enemy’s daughter. I see no harm in making the necessary checks I need to establish certain truths.”

“I told you I was a virgin, so you should have known I was clean.”

“I know no such thing, and you would be surprised what shit people get up to so they can still pass for a virgin. I like to be careful. I’m curious, though. Weren’t you planning on having children with Felipe?”

I try to control the bile rising in my stomach and force myself to look like I’m grieving.

“I don’t think that’s any of your business.”

He leans close again and looms before me with a mocking smirk. “Everything is my business, Malyshka.”

He says Malyshka with emphasis this time, and I realize for the first time—and with annoyance because of the meaning—that it’s easier if he calls me that or princess than Adriana.

It’s easy because it’s new, and he’s new to me.

“In any event,” he adds, “you’re clear for me to take you at anytime and anywhere I want.”

“What about you? How do I know you’re clean?”

He chuckles, and the sound ripples through me. He lifts a lock of my hair and twirls it around his tattooed forefinger. I risk glancing down to see if I can make out what the tattoo means, but I think it’s in Russian. I also think the tattoos on his hands are prison tattoos. José taught me a few things like that I needed to be aware of.

He just never went into depth. José cautioned me and said if I ever saw a Russian Mafioso man with the type of tattoos Mikhail was sporting, I should avoid them at all costs. Run if you have to. He actually said those words.

Now look at me. I’m waiting for the said Russian Mafioso man to confirm he’s clean enough to fuck me bareback.

Christ.

What hell dimension did I fall into?

And why the hell did I think it was a good idea to ask him that?

The corner of his lips turn up into a sinfully wicked smile that tightens my insides, and a spark of arousal coils from my belly right into my pussy.

“Baby girl, I’m clean because I say I am.”

Baby girl. It’s clear he didn’t call me Malyshka just now to make a point.

“Anything else you want to know about my dick?” he asks, crude and crass.

“No, thank you. There is nothing.” I bite down hard on my back teeth and will myself to concentrate. Now that he’s here, I can ask the burning question on my mind and try to steer clear of any talk of sex. “Where is José?”

“José Diaz is no longer any of your concern.”

Panic turns my knees to water. “What does that mean?”

“It means exactly what I said.”

“Did you kill him?” I stutter. Tears prick the backs of my eyes as I imagine him taking pleasure in telling me he has.

“Not yet, Malyshka.”

“Is he in Mexico still?”

“Yes.”

At least he’s answering my questions.

“Is he going to stay there?”

“No.”

“When will he come here?”

“That’s enough questions about the old man,” he cuts me off, and I catch myself when curiosity flickers deeper in his eyes.

Although it’s infuriating, I see why he thought José and I were involved. It goes back to that fact that I’m showing more emotion over him than Raul—my supposed father.

I need to be Adriana again and think the way she would in this situation.

“What about my father’s body? What did you do with it?” I ask in a fake breathy tone.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” he taunts.

“Of course, I do. He was my father. Did you burn him like you did my fiancé?”

At the word fiancé, he gives me a look of indignation.

“Yes, I did. I burned your bastard father’s body the same way I burned your beloved fiancé. I wished I’d hacked his head off, the same way I cut off Felipe’s. I should have fed their heads to the dogs before I left.”

“You monster,” I gasp.

Before I can say another word, his hand snaps out and clamp around my throat. He squeezes so hard I see stars and my breath cuts off completely.

“I’m a monster? Really? I guess that’s what I look like to you, princess. Did you know what your father and fiancé were like? Do tell me. Did you know?”

If I say no, it would be another lie he’ll be able to spot from a mile away.

Everybody knew what Raul and Felipe were like.

I don’t think he’s assumed me to be some naïve princess locked away in a tower. He would have heard the rumors about Adriana. The whispers were either about her beauty or her evil. In fact, I’d say there was a good mixture of those rumors, so I can’t say no.

“Yes,” I choke out, and the moment I do, I regret it because now he looks like he’s going to kill me.

“Did you love Felipe?” he demands.

Again, I have to give an answer I know Adriana would have to say. It’s unfortunately, another answer that will infuriate him.

“Yes.”

“Then you’re just as much of a monster as him and your fucking father. You are just as fucking evil. Your fiancé shot my mother right in front of me. Shot her right in the head with a rifle. She had no hope. Then he sold my sister to sex slavers who abused her until she begged them for death. That’s what your fiancé did to my family. At your father’s orders. Those are the men you love, Adriana Alvarez. People who steal lives and kill souls.”

I wish I could tell him I understand exactly what he means, but I can’t.

I wish I could tell him I hate Raul and Felipe more than he does, but I can’t.

He would just kill me now.

When he releases me, and I take in the disgust on his face, my priorities shift.

I stagger backward and catch my breath as the person inside me who’s still Natalia de Leon fights against the thought of him believing she’s as evil as those devils.

The feeling is so strong that I shake my head and allow instinct to guide me.

“I’m not like them,” I blurt. “I’m not evil. I swear to you, I’m not. If you knew me, you would see.”

I don’t know if what I say has any effect at all because he doesn’t answer. He just walks away and leaves me standing there in the cold.

It’s a repeat of last night, except I feel he hates me more than he did then.