Chapter 18: CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

MIRABELLA.

Twenty-four hours.

Forty-eight hours.

Seventy-two hours.

I should be named as an accurate timekeeper by now.

Fuck!

I heave out a sigh of distress as I pace back and forth in my room.

Nerve-racking.

That is the only description I have of how the last few days have been. Seventy-two hours since Matteo walked out the front door and he's not walked back in.

There's no explanation to how I'm feeling but I'm feeling it. Every form of discomfort and worry, like a lump caught up in my throat, like my heart is unable to beat at its normal rhythm. Like a strong conviction that something has gone terribly wrong.

Thinking about it, what business meeting takes this long to conclude?

It’s stupid. I’m stupid. But somehow, I’m worried sick for my husband and I’ve cursed myself out more times than I can count for it but my worries are not just going away.

My feet slap against the floor as I make my way out to my balcony. I pull the double door wide open and take a long calming breath as I absorb nature’s beauty but it doesn’t take a second before the calm swiftly drifts into a storm.

There are a few loud bangs like someone setting off firecrackers, but it doesn’t seem right. It feels as though I just heard gunshots. But who could be firing shots at this time of the night knowing that Julia could have another panic attack?

My question is answered when there's loud chatter from a distance; might be described as screaming amongst many different people. Paranoia grips me when a few cars speed across the estate until they’re outside the gates. Other guards take their stances with their guns in hand ready for defense, practically putting the estate on an emergency lockdown.

What the fuck is going on?

I gasp loudly when I hear one of them yell, “il nostro don è stato attaccato”.

Gesú.

Matteo?

Before I can get any words out of my mouth, my door is pushed open and my personal guard runs in frantically. “We need to get you to safety ma’am.” He sternly affirms and I protest.

“Where’s Matteo? Is he close? Is he hurt?” I startle myself when I start rambling on and on, literally screaming my concern for a man who wouldn’t bat an eye if I was dying in front of him.

The guard looks at me in disbelief and blinks a few times before heaving out a sigh. “I don’t have answers to your questions for now but I’m acting upon direct orders from the boss. Your safety comes first and you need to comply or I’d have to force you to.” He declares and I scowl at him.

One thing doesn’t escape my notice.

My safety comes first? Direct orders from the boss?

My lips tilt up the tiniest bit in the realization that Matteo might just care about me after all.

As strong-headed as I am, I stand my ground and refuse to move a foot until I’m sure Matteo’s safe. The guard bangs on my door frustratedly and two other guards run in immediately looping their arms around my elbows and dragging me away like a prisoner.

I scream and curse all I want but it’s all futile then I decide to quit struggling and save myself some strength.

We successfully go down the second floor and arrive at the first and that’s when my ears pick up on painful grunt sounds coming from the ground floor.

I hear him loud and clear and I freeze for a minute. “Where the fuck is my wife!” Matteo’s voice ricochets in pain and I pick up my pace. He’s asking for me but his voice sounds strained and the fact has me worried.

“She’s safe, man. You should worry about yourself,” I hear another voice speak and I know it’s one of the boys that’d comfortably speak to him so casually.

“I didn’t ask if she was safe! I want to see her!” I hear him groan in pain and one of the boys continues screaming at him to shut his mouth up and save up some energy.

My heart thumbs against my ribcage as I run down the stairs. Jump down actually. “Matteo?” I call out as loud as I can but I don’t get any answer, just a weak hum that has me gripped in fear of what I might find when I reach the bottom of the stairs.

I’m already as sweaty as can be before I reach the living area where the real commotion is happening.

As I reach the bottom of the stairs, I freeze in my tracks when I find Matteo being conveyed on a stretcher. He’s grunting and unable to stay calm while his hands are pressing against his abdomen. They run past me as fast as a lightning bolt and head into the dark hallway and I hurriedly follow behind.

“W-what happened?” I stutter out but no one seems to pay me any attention. A tear slides down my cheek and I swallow hard on nothing in an attempt to wet my dried-up throat.

Alessio turns around, immediately passing an order to the guards. “Don’t fucking let her into the medical room or you all are fucked!” He roars and looks me up and down in utter resentment, “Lock her up if you have to.” He finishes his statement and turns back around.

What the fuck did I do to this fucker to deserve his treatment of me.

A futile struggle passes between me and the guards for the longest minutes of my life. I cry and beg but they won’t budge. I get lucky when Matteo’s mother walks into the hallway. She observes the commotion with narrowed eyes and heaves out a sigh, “What the fuck is going on?” Her voice is monotone and it startles me that a sweet woman like her could have such a frightening demeanor.

“The boss’s second in command passed an instruction not to let her in—” Before the guard is finished with his answer, Maria smacks him across the face so hard that he stumbles.

“Listen and listen good, this is Matteo’s wife! The Don’s wife! You have absolutely no right to touch or restrict her from freely accessing any part of this house, Do I make myself clear?” Her voice is hoarse and the guards nod.

“If the order doesn’t come from Matteo himself then it means nothing when it’s about his wife.” She states finally and grips my wrist, gently pulling me behind her until we’re in front of the said medical room.

I peek my head through and wow. If I hadn’t lived in this house long enough, I’d think this to be an actual hospital ward. It makes sense that Matteo’s father is a doctor considering how this medical room is packed with all the equipment one might require.

Maria nudges me to go in and I do. I stand by a corner and observe the chaos. The boys are so engrossed in finding a solution that they don’t even note my presence.

“Fuck! That fucking doctor!” Alessio throws his phone hard against a wall that it smashes into tiny pieces as he grits each word out and I flinch. “They did this on purpose. They waited for us to get so close to the house before they attacked because they knew Matteo’s father wouldn’t be home and the doctor would be far away from here.” Alessio’s voice gets louder in irritation as he paces back and forth.

The boys argue back and forth as they come up with different solutions. They obviously can’t operate on him because the bullet hit a very delicate place and they have no experience. Maxwell suggests that they take the chopper but they immediately dismiss the idea having considered the fact that those who attacked them might be waiting to launch another attack.

They conclude that the attack was solely to take Matteo’s life and they can’t put him at risk by taking him outside the gates of the estate.

I clear my throat and Matteo’s head snaps to mine. We hold our stare for longer than a minute and I mouth ‘Dio mio’, gaining a strained scoff from him.

He gives me a tight-lipped smile, “There she is…my wife. I’ve been asking for you.” That’s the last thing he says before his eyes shut and his head falls to the side. I scream his name and run to him, immediately placing my palms one above the other on the left side of his chest.

“Keep pressure on it. Don’t fucking stop until I say otherwise,” I breathe out as I commence a CPR procedure. I sniffle and tears stream down my face as I continue applying chest compressions on Matteo.

Minutes pass and he finally gasps out a breath and I shudder. I have no explanation as to how I’m feeling or how I’m reacting at the moment because I’m unaware of myself. All I know is that I’m beside my husband who seems to be bleeding out a little too much and I’m unable to help him.

I’m unable to help him because I’m afraid of what the outcome might be.

I have an idea—scratch that, I am ninety percent sure that I can perform a successful surgery on him but I’m so scared that my hands are trembling. It has been so long since I tried my hand out with it but if I delay any further, Matteo might just die and I’d hate myself for not trying at all.

God help me.

This is fucked up.

I gather the courage and declare, “I’ll do it.”

The room goes silent for minutes and even if I’m not directly looking at any of the boys, I know their eyes are threatening to burn holes through me. I let out a shaky exhale, “I’ll perform the surgery. I can-I have an idea.” My voice is shaky and Alessio laughs at me in mockery; more so in anger.

“You expect us to let you perform a surgery on him based on an idea? Are you insane?” His voice roars and I clasp my fingers together.

“What other choices do you have? I’m able to help him make progress but what are you able to do? Stand around and banter words with each other like little girls until he dies? If he loses more blood than he already has, what do you think will happen, huh?” I make sure to keep my voice as steady and as threatening as possible.

“You better watch that mouth of yours!” Alessio warns and I scoff as I narrow my eyes at him. “Or what? You better get off your high horse and let me do something at least or you’d be planning your so-called brother’s funeral in a matter of minutes.”

Where the hell is all this courage coming from?

Alessio stares at me in despair for a few more seconds until he’s resolved on a decision. “Well then, just be sure nothing goes wrong or I’ll make sure to cut you into little pieces and feed you to my dogs.”

Now that’s one hell of a threat.

. . .

The last few minutes were me getting ready to commence surgery. I scrubbed, put on my gloves, sterilized the surgical tools I’ll be needing, checked Matteo’s blood pressure and Airway to be certain that I’m on the green side.

Pretty decent, and it’s time to go big or go home.

I clean Matteo up and disinfect the areas around his wound. “Hey,” I lean down and speak in a hushed tone and he grunts in response. “You’ve held your ground so far but I need you to do this with me. In no time, we’ll get that little shit out of you, okay? Just breathe and stay awake; you stay in control of the pace at which you breathe, hmm? You can do that, can you not?” I ask and he slightly nods his head and muffles a ‘yes’.

Good.

“I need O Negative blood available; we need to commence blood transfusion. He’s obviously lost a lot,” I say to no one in particular but Pablo speedily leaves the room to go grab as many blood bags as he can.

“Matteo, make sure to stay awake, talk to me if you have to but don’t you dare go to sleep until I say so.” My voice is stern as I stick the electrodes of the electrocardiograph machine on certain parts of his chest and arms.

“Are you bleeding?” Matteo grunts in an extremely strained manner when I go in with a surgical knife and make an opening around the area where he got shot. I scoff. “No. it’s all you, husband.” I answer as I continue making very little progress with the surgery.

Matteo attempts a scoff but grunts instead, “You are beautiful. My blood looks perfect on your skin. If I wasn’t so fucked up, I’d be fucking into your pussy relentlessly like my life depended on it.” I genuinely laugh at his remarks and I know if I looked in the mirror right now, I’d very well be burning red.

“I’m flattered,” I simply answer and my eyes widen. “There’s a sign of hemorrhage,” I panic. Why me? “We’ll take care of the internal bleeding before we take out the bullet. Maxwell? I need you to relentlessly pump that blood into him, don’t go slow and don’t stop, do you understand? His life might very well be in your hands right now.”

. . .

About forty-five minutes into the surgery I believe and we’re still at it; didn’t expect it to be this difficult. Matteo is pretty much stable which is a good thing although he’s said a lot of crazy things that have me laughing my lungs out. Must admit, I love the distraction but it’s too distracting.

I go in with the screw-type bullet extractor and carefully turn the handles to lengthen the screw. I’m successful at piercing the bullet but I fail at being careful enough when pulling it out. A fucking mistake. Jesus.

His blood gushes out with force that it splashes all over my face and gets into my mouth even. I gasp and stumble back as my hands begin shaking uncontrollably.

Everything and nothing is happening all at once and the only thing I can hear is the electrocardiograph machine beeping uncontrollably, somewhat indicating that Matteo’s heartbeat is no longer normal and his blood pressure has risen to its all-time high. But I’m unable to move. I blink rapidly and try to shake myself out of the shock but nothing seems to work.

“Mamma! Please don’t close your eyes. I’m right here. I’m putting enough pressure on it.” I cry out as I tightly hold my palm against my mother’s neck to stop the blood that’s gushing out uncontrollably.

Blood splatters all over my face.

My mother moves my hand and nods to me, urging me to let her go. Begging me to let her misery come to an end.

More blood splatter.

I feel strong arms gripping my shoulders and shaking me up but I’m standing still with my body shaking and my mouth agape as tears stream down my face. I gasp aloud when a slap is delivered to the side of my face. “M-Matteo?” I stutter like a person who just awoke from a slumber. Tears spewing uncontrollably from my eyes.

“Get a grip of yourself and finish what you started. You’re doing so well. Don’t be dismayed.” Maxwell encourages me and I nod as I wipe my tears off with the back of my palm.

“Put him on the fucking ventilator,” I scream frantically as I turn on the defibrillator and attach the pads to Matteo’s chest.

I step back and wait.

The first shock comes and there’s no sign of life.

Fuck. I shudder and throw up in my mouth.

The second shock comes and there’s still no sign of life. At this point, Alessio’s eyes have killed me a thousand times in different ways.

I resume chest compressions and Pablo continues pumping blood into Matteo so relentlessly that I suspect his fingers might fall off.

Do they really care that much for him?

Matteo’s fingers finally move the slightest bit and the beeping from the electrocardiograph machine normalizes. Fucking finally.

I resume the surgery. I speedily take care of the bleeding and stitch him up. When I’m done and confirm that he’s all good, My hands instinctively clutch onto my chest and give it a light squeeze. I let out a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding in and that’s all it takes for me to crumble.

My ass lands flat on the ground and my head is buried between my knees as I sob. My body shakes vigorously as each sob wracks through me.

It’s unnerving, having a panic attack while performing surgery on someone. Blacking out and beating yourself up for a life you couldn’t save while someone else’s life depends on you.

Standing up for one hour while trying to save someone’s life even when you have zero qualifications.

I sob more and two arms wrap around me. I’m surprised when I raise my head up to find Alessio squatting beside me and hugging me. Comforting me.

“Alessio,” I croak and throw my arms around him. “Shh, it’s okay, you did good. Thank you, Really. Grazie. You have no idea what you’ve done for us.”

I hug him tighter. Alessio thanking me means a whole lot to me and I’ll bask in the satisfaction it brings.

“Go clean up, we’ll finish up here.” Pablo states and I smile at him. I don’t know why, but I feel some type of connection with Pablo.

This is it; I’ve done my part, fingers crossed Matteo wakes up in a short while. This might just be the change I’ve desperately sought.

I’ll have him by my corner because now he’ll be indebted to me for saving his life.

Genius move.