Chapter 39 YOU LOOK WEAK
RAGNAR'S POV
My fists clench as I roll my fingers and confirm my knuckles cracking. Yurik stirs inside me again, also eager for the violence.
I find another bag and unleash a controlled punch.
Each strike is precise as I try to time calm and also ignore Yurik. It’s hard to avoid someone who lives in your head and shares thoughts with you.
I try all the various methods to exhaust myself and tire my body but it doesn’t seem to work that way thanks to my Alpha healing.
My genes made it so that I am always in my peak state whether I want it or not.
But it’s not just enough to drown out the thoughts swirling in my head.
There was also more.
Sebastian’s face sighing in ecstasy, his voice when he's pleading and the way his body fits against mine like the perfect puzzle piece.
“You denied our mate.” Yurik whispers in accusation at me.
I hit harder, the bag groaning under my assault. I hiss in frustration as once again sand trickles from a seam.
Ahh another one.
I'm pretty rational and tame but I’ve destroyed more training equipment today than I can count over the years.
It feels like I'm fighting myself.
The bond suppression technique I’ve been using is fraying and testing my control everyday.
I know it wasn't meant to last long, but I don't want to put Sebastianin that position.
Mating and marking him would put a red flag all over him.
Already I'm marked as a cursed wolf due to some stupid prophecy about how a family of mine will challenge the moon goddess and the last thing I need is people or anyone finding out Sebastian’s related to me.
The moon goddess fanatics will tear him up and eat him raw.
Rival packs and rogues will exploit the fallout causing another war and I'm done with fighting wars in my lifetime.
Maybe this is the reason for the sense of unease and the unsettling feeling I've been feeling all month.
I switch to kicks with my boot slamming into the bag brutally with force so strong it causes the chain to rattle.
I hear footsteps coming from behind me but I don't stop punching.
I know who it is before he speaks.
I could smell the scent of herbs coming from him from a mile away.
Honestly though, I don't know how he even manages to successfully hunt as a werewolf when everything in a one kilometer radius can smell him.
Maybe that's why he went and became a pack healer.
He’s been the pack healer for decades and he's one of the few that I trust with my life.
Hell, he’s saved me more than once, he's earned the trust.
“Alpha,” he says, his voice calm but his tone low with concern. “You’re up early. Or… have you even slept?”
I grunt in response, landing another combo. “Why have you come, Richard?”
He doesn’t answer right away and it irks me. He always does this when he has ‘something to talk about’.
Richard physically hates physical work or dealing with pack politics so he's always secluded away in his office.
But not today though.
But instead of answering, he circles around towards the other side and leans against a nearby pillar with his arms crossed.
He’s older than me, in his mid-forties, with faded blonde hair and kind eyes. His physical build is lean and not built for combat but he’s seen enough battles to hold his own considering he was the former Beta of this pack before Ava.
“You’re pummeling that bag like it owes you money,” he remarks dryly. “Or like you’re trying to outrun something, Ragnar.”
I pause to wipe my sweat from my brow with the back of my hand. “Stop dawdling and spit it out.”
Richard sighs like he tried. “The pack’s restless, Ragnar. Whispers of you are turning into murmurs and you know how that can work out right? One careless whisper or malicious comment can cause fear and lead to another Bloody Solstice.”
The Bloody Solstice was an inter pack war that happened when my father was still alive. He was to inherit this pack after proving himself right but one ‘careless’ remark from my uncle about how it's cheating for him not to compete since he's related to the current Alpha caused there to be a big blown out fight between wolves that supported my uncle and the wolves that supported my father.
It wasn't on the winter solstice before the fight ended but the amount of bodies piled up and the blood shed on that day made the name turn to the Bloody Solstice.
I snort in response, resuming my assault on the bag. “The pack’s always restless about something or everything. Rogues at the border, rival packs sniffing around, I don't care let them murmur.”
“It’s not just external threats Ragnar.” He steps closer lowering his voice even though we’re obviously alone. “It’s you. The air of mystery you’ve got going on and not responding, it’s putting you on thin ice. People, wolves are starting to question why.”
I roll my eyes. For all his fine qualities, subtlety isn’t Richard’s strong suit, but he’s trying. “And question what exactly?”
He hesitates for a beat before “Your choices ehm, your… distractions.”
I stop midpunch with one hand still holding the strike before turning to face him fully.
“Cut the bullshit, Richard. You’re not here to dance around a topic. What is my ‘deal’ with Sebastian? That’s what you want to ask, isn’t it?”
He huffs in exasperation throwing his hands up like he's given up. “Fine! Yes. What’s going on with you and the Omega? First you assign him to your personal guard detail, him an Omega of all wolves who's barely out of puphood and inexperienced as they come. And now?”
He shifts around nervously like he doesn’t want to say the other part. “Rumors…erm… are flying that you two are well… involved in like…the ways that go beyond duty.”
The nerve of this damn wolf.