Chapter 32 HEAT
SEBASTIAN'S POV
The pack house feels different today.
I don't know why it changed but it's no longer as loud and rowdy as it always is.
Everything feels… sharp.
Glances are being directed at me a little too long and conversations stop the moment I pass by.
In its place, are a lot of murmuring and pointings.
I can feel them pricking at my back like needles on my skin.
I mind my business and keep my head down as I enter the dining hall, the smell of roasted meat and bread turning my stomach.
Normally, the dining hall is one of the few places where I can pretend to be a normal wolf but today, it feels like a courtroom.
I grab a tray and move toward the far end away from people but I don’t make it three steps before I hear it.
“So that’s him.”
I flinch but I don’t stop.
“I heard he doesn’t even deny it if you ask him.”
“Of course he wouldn’t, Omegas like that never do.”
My fingers tighten around the tray as I feel Alisander stir with unease.
I slide onto a bench at the far end near the wall where I focus on my plate.
It doesn’t help.
“He thinks he’s special.”
That one is louder and more deliberate
I glance up before I can stop myself.
Three wolves sit across from me, two Betas and a young warrior I vaguely recognize from our previous training sessions.
None of them look away when our eyes meet and one of them actually smiles.
“Must be nice,” the Beta says, leaning back with his arms crossed. “Getting special attention from the Alpha.”
My throat tightens.
I want to tell them to stop.
I want to ask and demand what I’ve done to deserve this.
I want to stupidly scream the truth about all of this.
That I am his mate.
But I swallow it down hard.
Saying that out loud wouldn’t save me, it would only kill me.
Because as far as the pack knows, Alpha Ragnar has no mate anymore. And Omegas who claim Alphas without proof don’t live long enough to regret it.
“I heard he caused the attack.”
That one makes my heart shake and I freeze.
The Beta across from me tilts his head at me. “Think about it. Rogues show up out of nowhere and suddenly sprout nonsense about judgment not long after he gets close to the Alpha.”
The word drips with implication.
“Besides, he wouldn’t be the first Omega to try to weaken an Alpha by spreading his legs.”
The words hit like a slap as they all laugh.
My wolf snarls furious in me but I force him down.
My hands shake as I push my tray away, my appetite completely gone.
“I didn’t,” I say quietly.
The table goes silent.
They hadn’t expected me to speak.
“I didn’t cause anything,” I repeat, my voice thin but steady. “And I didn’t ask for anyone’s attention.”
One of them scoffs. “Sure you didn’t.”
I stand and rush out of there before my legs give out.
The walk out feels even longer than the walk in.
My eyes burn from the whispers and by the time I make it into the hallway, my skin feels too tight and my clothes don't feel right on me.
I feel uncomfortable.
Hot.
I press my palm to my forehead, breathing slowly.
You’re fine, I tell myself. You’re just stressed out with nerves.
But the heat doesn’t fade away so I hide in the infirmary.
The heat follows me all morning.
A strange feeling of warmth under my skin.
It causes sweat to build up in my temples with my heart rate increasing.
I think maybe this is a panic attack.
I should run away from here.
The urge comes suddenly and sharply.
I should just run now and run very far away before this gets worse.
Before Ragnar starts to look at me the same way they're all looking at me.
Before even he believes them.
That thought hurts more than the whispers I've endured all morning.
I haven’t seen him since the night I bit him. The same night that I heard rogues came and committed mass suicide at the border.
What if he thinks I did this?
What if he regrets being with me?
I stagger to a stop near the courtyard, my chest suddenly tight.
Run away,my instincts urge. Before he rejects you.
“No.”
Alisander’s voice cuts through the fog, waking me.
“No running,” he says firmly. “Not today Sebastian.”
I grit my teeth. “They all hate me.”
“They fear what they don’t understand, Ragnar doesn’t.”
I let out a shaky breath. “You don’t know that.”
Alisander is quiet for a moment, then continues. “I know you won’t survive if you hide or run.”
That stops me cold.
“You have a shift,” he adds. You go and you don't avoid this.”
My stomach twists.
And he's right. Avoiding Ragnar won’t make this better. It will only make it worse.
So I go.
The walk to his quarters feels unreal, like I'm wading through water.
The hot and anxious feeling inside me grows heavier, coiling low in my belly.
My skin feels sensitive, too sensitive and even the air feels too much.
By the time I reach my post, my vision is swimming.
And Alpha Ragnar is right there.
He stands near the windows, his figure massive with one hand holding a glass of brandy?
I wasn't sure.
But he looks tired and pissed.
And when he turns around to see me, his eyes flicker with either guilt or something else I couldn't put my finger on.
“Sebastian?”
The sound of my name on his lips makes my knees wobble as I take a step towards him.
“Woah–”
My vision tilts violently and I trip.
But string arms catch me before I can hit the floor.
His hands are strong and steady as they pull me to my feet in concern
Strong arms catch me before I hit the floor.
“Are you alright?” he asks sharply, eyes scanning my face. “You’re burning up.”
I try to answer but my mouth is dry. I can feel my heartbeat roaring in my ears.
“I–I don’t know,” I manage to croak out.
He frowns leaning in closer and that's when it happens.
The air between us changes as a sweet cloying smell spills from me without any warning and covers the entire room.
The smell is heavy as it wraps us both leaving me panting.
Alpha Ragnar stiffens with his pupils blown wide open.
“Sebastian, are you in heat?”