Chapter 122 I STILL WANT YOU
RAGNAR'S POV
“No.” I reply finally after I see he hasn't burst into laughter or anything and I actually realize he's actually not joking.
His lips twitch faintly with mirth.
“I actually expected you to say that.”
“Then you already have your answer.”
He exhales slowly, like he’s considering something he wants to say.
Lance? Actually considering before he says something?
This whole situation suddenly feels surreal.
“What’s the difference?” he asks after a moment.
My eyes narrow slightly in confusion.
“Between then and now, what's the difference?” he clarifies. “Between us.”
There’s no hesitation in my response.
“Everything.”
His gaze sharpens.
“That’s not an answer Ragnar.”
“It’s the only one you’re getting and it's Alpha Ragnar to you!”
A flicker of irritation crosses his face as he exhales loudly.
“You chose me once you know,” Lance says, voice tightening just slightly. “Or have you forgotten all about that?”
“I didn’t choose you,” I correct. “I was just with you, not that it was anything serious.”
There’s a difference, a very clear one because Lance was the one that started the relationship years ago as just something casual.
Why was he now coming back to revisit it now?
I see it in the way his jaw tightens in anger and in the way his fingers curl slightly at his sides.
“But you could again,” he presses on. “ We could have something serious now.”
There it is, the real reason for all these stupid charades.
He wanted to be casual so why did he go on a rampage and do those terrible things years ago when I ended things?
“You don’t have a mate now, at least you can't have one anymore,” Lance continues. “Not one that matters or stays with you.”
My chest tightens for a second as he mentions that.
He notices but he probably thinks it's for a different reason.
They all still don't know that I have a second chance mate.
“So what’s stopping you?” he asks quietly. “We’ve done this before. We know how this works.”
My gaze turns colder.
“This,” I say slowly, “is exactly why it won’t happen between us, ever again ”
His brows draw together slightly.
“Because you think this is something you can just step back into,” I continue. “Like nothing has changed.”
“And has it?” he challenges.
“No. A lot has changed since Lance.”
The word is final and unyielding. Even without having a second chance mate I would still reject him.
Everything has changed, I have changed from that blubbering naive fool I had been.
“You had your place and moment,” I add, my voice dropping lower. “That time is over now.”
There's a heavy moment as Lance studies me again and longer this time as I'd he's just meeting me for the first time.
Like he’s searching for something that isn’t there anymore.
“And what?” he asks after a moment. “You’re just going to throw it away because of the hope for him? That he'll choose you over his true mate? Well news flash he won't! They all choose their true mates over you!”
My jaw tightens.
“This has nothing to do with you,” I say.
“It has everything to do with me,” he snaps suddenly, the calm slipping just enough to reveal the ugliness under his mask. “Because I was here first, before anyone.”
I don’t react or rise to anger because all of this is nonsense.
Sebastian is my mate so he should be the one I'm talking to, not Lance.
“You were here,” I agree. “And now you’re not, it's a simple thing.”
Something in his expression hardens with undisguised fury
“You’re actually choosing him over me?” Lance says.
It’s not a question I need to answer because we both know the answer to it.
Besides, my silence says enough.
His eyes darken slightly.
“Even after he walked away and chose Alpha Dax, who is his mate?” he pressed on.
That,
That almost gets a reaction from me but I hold it down and lock it away.
I need no more reminders that Sebastian has publicly been claimed by another bastard.
Because Lance doesn’t get to see that reaction, not from me.
“Leave this instant!” I say again, my voice is colder now and terrifying.
How dare he say something like that?!
I'm already fighting against committing bloody murder and he's provoking me.
“This isn’t your territory to wander into whenever you feel like it.”
“If you’re here to visit your sister, then go. But you will remain in the designated grounds.”
The reminder is deliberate and clear. I draw a boundary between the both of us as Lance lets out a scoff.
Lance lets out a quiet breath before taking a step back involuntarily in disbelief.
“You’ve become insufferable,” he mutters.
“I’ve become an Alpha, a grown one. I suggest you do the same since you now lead your own pack.”
“Is that what you call this?” he shoots back. “Shutting everything out? Cutting people off like they meant nothing?”
“I call it knowing what stays dead in the past and what doesn’t.”
His eyes flash.
“And I don’t stay?”
“No.”
The answer from me is instantaneous and unapologetic.
For a moment, something dangerous flickers across his face as he looks at me with a sharp stare.
After that, it settles into something resigned and colder.
“I see,” he says quietly.
“You know,” Lance continues after a moment with his voice dropping slightly, “things are changing for a lot of packs.”
I didn't respond as I stared at him.
Maybe he'll finally give up and leave me in peace.
“I’m not where I used to be,” he adds. “Not anymore anyway.”
“I’m coming into power with my new position,” he says.
There’s something in the way he says it that sounds less than a flaunt but more like a threat.
“And if I cannot have you,” Lance finishes, his eyes locking onto mine with something dark and unwavering, “don’t dare hope for another.”