Chapter 118 HE LOOKED SAD
SEBASTIAN’S POV
I don’t remember how we got here.
One second I’m in the square, drowning in voices and accusations and eyes that want to tear me apart, and the next–
I’m being dragged through the forest.
Branches scrape lightly against my arms as Alpha Dax moves really fast with his grip firm around my wrist.
It's not painful or rough… but he's unyielding.
It's almost like he’s afraid that if he lets go, I’ll disappear.
Or worse,
I'll run back.
He’s not wrong.
My chest tightens at the thought.
Ragnar.
The image of him standing there, really still and cold, burns behind my eyes.
The way he was just silent there and watching me has to be one of the hardest things I've seen in my life.
I shouldn’t have turned, I knew I shouldn’t have turned.
But I did.
And now I can’t unsee it.
The way his jaw clenched and teeth were his eyes, those sharp and unreadable eyes were locked on to me like I've done something unforgivable.
Like I had just betrayed him.
My steps falter slightly but Dax doesn’t slow down.
“Keep up,” he mutters, not unkindly, but just… focused.
We move in silence for a while after that with the forest the only sound we're hearing.
The further we get from the square, the quieter everything becomes.
There are no whispers or judging stares in the forest, there's no suffocating pressure from the pack.
Just the sound of leaves under my foot and my own thoughts suffocating me.
Which are somehow even worse.
What is Ragnar thinking right now?
Was he mad?
Was he relieved that I didn't reveal his identity?
Or–
My stomach twists with confusion and tension.
Or does he think I lied or that I hid something from him?
That I–
I suck in a very sharp breath as my free hand pressing briefly against my chest.
The bond, it's there and now it's somehow punishing me for doing the right thing.
It hums faintly beneath my skin, quieter than before but still very much present.
So why did he look like that?
Why did he look… well somber?
Sad?
The thought hits me out of nowhere, stopping me in my tracks.
Dax finally slows, turning slightly to look back at me when he realizes I’m no longer keeping pace.
“What is it?” he asks.
I open my mouth, then close it again because I don’t even know where to start.
Everything feels so tangled and messy.
It's all wrong.
“I…” My voice comes out weaker than I expected. “I saw him.”
Dax’s expression shifts slightly, just a flicker of understanding.
“The Alpha?” he asks.
I nod as my throat feels tight.
“He was right there,” I continued quietly. “At the edge of the square.”
Watching me.
Dax exhales slowly, releasing my wrist now that we’ve stopped moving.
“That was… unfortunate timing I guess,” he says.
Unfortunate, that's one word for it.
Is that what this was?
A hollow laugh almost escapes me, but I swallow it down.
“Unfortunate?” I repeat under my breath.
My hands curl into fists at my sides.
“What is he going to think?” I ask, more to myself than to him. “What do you think he is going to do?”
The questions spill out before I can stop them.
“Is he angry? Does he think I betrayed him somehow? Or–” My voice cracks slightly. “Or does he not care at all?”
That last one hurts more than it should.
Dax watches me for a moment, really watches me, like he’s trying to piece something together.
Then he sighs in resignation.
“Sebastian,” he says, calmer now, steadier. “You’re spiraling.”
“I’m not–”
“You are.”
The words aren’t harsh, but they're certain.
And somehow that makes it worse.
I drag a hand through my hair, pacing a few steps away before turning back to him.
“I just–” I stop, frustrated. “This wasn’t supposed to happen like this.”
I wasn’t supposed to be exposed like this.
Ragnar wasn’t supposed to see me do something like that without any explanation from me.
Everything was supposed to stay controlled and safe.
And now–
I feel like I'm grasping at straws and everything is slipping through my fingers.
Dax steps closer, his presence grounding me in a way I didn’t expect.
“Listen to me,” he says.
I force myself to look up at him.
“You’re dealing with two separate things,” he continues. “A mate… and a lover of some sort.”
My breath catches in my throat and for a second, I almost tell him everything.
I almost blurt it all out that Ragnar is actually my mate and that I'm not cheating.
No.
He doesn’t know.
He can’t know.
“And that,” Dax adds, misreading my silence, “can get complicated.”
Complicated is one way to put it.
“You don’t have to figure everything out right now,” he says. “You don’t even have to explain anything to me or anyone yet.”
My brows knit together slightly.
“…I don’t?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “What you need to do is calm down first.”
Calm down, right. That's easy.
Still… I nod slowly.
Because what else can I do?
Dax studies me for another moment, then continues.
“We can maintain what we said back there,” he says. “About me being your mate if you want.”
My stomach twists again at the lie.
“We’ll stick to it,” he adds. “At least for now. It gives you time.”
Time?
Time to do what?
Figure things out I suppose?
To fix things or to just… delay the inevitable?
I don’t know and that terrifies me.
“You don’t have to face him immediately,” Dax says, softer now. “Not until you’re ready.”
But will I ever be ready?
The thought lingers heavily in my mind because I know that no matter how much time I buy myself, it changes nothing.
It doesn’t change the truth or anything and it's only a matter of time until everyone knows and finds out.
It doesn’t change the fact that I'm mated to Ragnar and my mate, Ragnar saw me–
With someone else, claiming another man as my mate.
My chest tightens painfully.
“I didn’t want him to find out like this,” I admit quietly.
Dax’s gaze sharpens slightly.
“You didn't want who to find out? Ragnar or your mate?” he asks.
I freeze.
Oh crap.
I shake my head quickly. “Nothing–I just mean–everything. The situation. The rumors.”
He watches me for a second longer than necessary like he knows I’m not saying everything before looking away.
But he doesn’t push for answers, instead he nods once.
“Then don’t let this be the end of it,” he says. “Control the narrative before it controls you and talk to your mate and Ragnar.”
I let out a slow breath, trying to steady myself again.
“Okay,” I say finally.
Dax gives a small nod.
“Okay,” he repeats. “Good.”
There’s a brief silence between us after that.
“We’ll take it one step at a time,” he adds.