Chapter 190
Sophia
One month later, I stepped into the dining room, carrying a tray of freshly sliced fruit. The evening sun streamed through the floor-to-ceiling windows, casting a golden glow over our makeshift family gathered around the massive table.
My heart did that weird flutter thing it always does nowadays—like I still can't believe this is my life now. After all the shit we've been through, here we are, playing happy family in a goddamn penthouse.
"Mom! Can we eat at the breakfast bar?" Lily called out, already halfway to the kitchen with Emma following close behind. "Please? It's Friday!"
I glanced at Blake, who gave me that half-smile that still made my stomach flip like a teenage girl with her first crush. Fucking ridiculous how he still affects me.
"Friday night special privileges," he reminded me.
"Fine, but use napkins, not sleeves," I called after them. Both girls cheered as they climbed onto the barstools at the kitchen island.
Blake's private chef, Paolo, was arranging their plates—all organic, locally sourced ingredients prepared specifically to accommodate Lily's dietary restrictions.
"The girls seem excited about starting school on Monday," Elizabeth observed, accepting a glass of wine from Blake. She'd been our rock through everything, stepping in to help with the girls whenever Blake and I needed to be at the hospital with Jasper.
"I'm a little nervous," I admitted, settling into my chair, anxiety gnawing at my insides. "It's a lot of change all at once." What if the other kids are mean to them? What if Lily has another allergic reaction and I'm not there? Jesus, when did I become this neurotic helicopter mom?
Blake squeezed my shoulder as he sat down beside me. "The admissions director assured me they'll both be well taken care of. "
"It's not just school," I said, picking at my salad, my appetite suddenly gone. "I'm worried about this place too. A penthouse isn't exactly ideal for raising children. They need more outdoor space." Every time Lily bounces off the walls, I feel like the worst mother in the world for keeping her in this fancy cage, no matter how many millions it cost.
Elizabeth reached across the table and patted my hand. "Home is where the heart is, Sophia, not the address or square footage."
"I know, but—" But what kind of childhood memory is a marble bathroom bigger than most people's apartments? Shit, I sound ungrateful even to myself.
"We'll take them to the park regularly," Blake interjected. "And on weekends, we can go to the family estate on Long Island. There's plenty of outdoor space there."
I nodded, though the thought of the Sterling family estate still made my skin crawl. Too many ghosts, too much history.
"Did you see the sunset at Amanda's service?" Elizabeth asked, smoothly changing the subject. "The way the light hit the water when they scattered her ashes—it was almost ethereal."
"It was beautiful," I agreed, recalling the beach ceremony from two weeks ago, a knot forming in my throat. Part of me had wanted to hate her even in death, but standing there watching her ashes drift into the ocean, all I felt was a hollow sadness. "I was surprised by how many people came."
"All the people were there," Blake said, his voice carefully neutral.
"And not a single one of them knew her," I muttered, then immediately regretted my bitterness. Fuck, I'm still so angry at her, and she's dead. What does that say about me? "Sorry. That wasn't fair."
Elizabeth shook her head. "No, you're right. Most were there to be seen, not to mourn."
"Poor Mia," I sighed, guilt twisting in my chest. "She looked so lost at the service."
"Maybe we should give her some space," Elizabeth suggested. "Perhaps next week we could drop off a casserole?"
Blake nodded, then brightened visibly. "I got some good news from the hospital today. Jasper might be coming out of the NICU isolette soon."
My heart leapt, a surge of hope washing through me. "Really? That's wonderful!" For all my complicated feelings about Amanda, that tiny baby had stolen my heart the moment I saw him. He was innocent in all this mess we adults had created.
"Dr. Robinson said his lung function has shown marked improvement," Blake continued, his eyes shining with pride. "They're going to try bottle feeding next week."
"That's fantastic," Elizabeth beamed. "He's a fighter, that one."
"We still need to be cautious," I added, my healthcare knowledge kicking in, anxiety immediately tempering my joy. "Preemies still need special attention. His immune system is still fragile." God, I sound like such a buzzkill, but after nearly losing Lily when she was born, I can't help it.
Blake nodded, acknowledging my concern while maintaining his optimism. "One step at a time."
From the kitchen island came peals of laughter as Paolo apparently did something entertaining with their dinner. The sound pierced right through my anxiety, warming me from within. After everything we'd been through, hearing children's laughter in this house felt like a fucking miracle.
"How are the wedding preparations coming along?" Elizabeth asked, helping herself to more salad.
"I found the perfect dress at that boutique," I said, unable to keep the excitement from my voice. Every time I think about actually marrying Blake—for real this time, with both of us fully aware of who we are to each other—I feel like I might burst. "It's simple but elegant."
"And the bridesmaids' dresses?" Elizabeth pressed.
"Still deciding. I'm thinking of a second reception dress too." Who the hell would have thought I'd be planning a society wedding? My past self would laugh her ass off.
Blake smiled. "You should have seen Lily and Emma trying on flower girl dresses yesterday. They looked like little princesses."
I couldn't help smiling at the memory, my chest tight with love. "Lily insisted on blue 'because it matches Daddy's eyes.'"
The word "Daddy" still felt new on my tongue when referring to Blake, but the joy on his face whenever Lily called him that made any awkwardness worth it. After all those years of keeping her from him, watching them together now was both heartbreaking and healing.
"The Sterling Children's Medical Center fundraiser is next Friday," Blake mentioned, seamlessly changing subjects. "I'll be giving a speech at the hotel to thank supporters."
I felt a knot form in my stomach, acid climbing up my throat. "Is Juliana planning to attend?" Despite the adjusted restraining order, the thought of seeing her still made my blood run cold. That bitch nearly destroyed everything I love, and I still wake up in cold sweats thinking about what she might try next.
"She might try," Blake acknowledged, his jaw tightening slightly. "But the security team has been given explicit instructions. Any attempt to violate the restraining order will be handled immediately."
Elizabeth looked concerned. "Is it wise to mention Jasper in your speech? Won't that just provoke her?"
"Jasper's story is part of why we're raising money," Blake explained. "His experience will help us raise funds for other children who need specialized care."
I nodded, understanding the strategy even as I worried about the potential fallout. If that woman so much as looks at either of my children, I swear to God I'll tear her apart with my bare hands. The intensity of my protective instinct sometimes scares even me.
"This past month without her controlling everything has been the most free, the most fulfilling month of my personal life," Blake said suddenly, raising his wine glass. "To new beginnings."
I clinked my glass against his, hope sparkling in my eyes despite the anxiety forever simmering beneath the surface. "This is just the beginning, Blake." Please, universe, let this happiness last. Haven't we been through enough shit already?
Elizabeth watched us with a satisfied smile, like a mother hen who'd successfully guided her chicks.
"Daddy! Tell a story!" Lily came racing from the breakfast bar and climbed onto Blake's lap, her face sticky with what appeared to be chocolate ice cream.
Blake exchanged a loving glance with me before turning his attention to our daughter. "Once upon a time, there was a brave princess and a lost knight..."
As Blake's deep voice filled the room with tales of adventure and true love, I felt a sense of peace settle over me.