Chapter 4: Ending the Pregnancy

After cursing, Amelia felt slightly better and got down to business.

"So, you definitely don't want this child. After the check-up tomorrow, should I go ahead and schedule the procedure?"

Touching her abdomen, suppressing the ache in her heart, Madison answered, "Yes."

As her voice fell, the tear that had been lingering in the corner of her eye did, too.

She felt she had wronged the child. But without a name, without recognition, she couldn't offer the child anything. She wouldn't dare to keep it.

She was just an ordinary woman from an average family. She couldn't bear to let her child live with the stigma of illegitimacy. Grayson would not legitimatize their relationship. He would never give her any chance to tie him down.

Affection.

Love.

Family.

And a child.

He wouldn't give in.

Madison closed her eyes, wiping away the tear that had found its way to the corner of her eye.

The night was thick and dark, and Madison slept restlessly.

Abruptly, it seemed she had slipped into a dream—a dream that took her back to her childhood.

As a child, she roamed with her mother, and the longest they stayed in one place was in a small fishing village called Murdock.

It was there that Madison first laid eyes on Grayson. The young Grayson didn't carry the somberness he had now. His features were so delicate and beautiful that he could've been a porcelain doll.

Later, Madison would learn that he was there recovering from an illness.

It seemed his recovery was difficult, as he often sat alone by the boardwalk in Murdock with tears in his eyes.

Whenever Madison saw him, she would bring over a lollipop to cheer him up.

At first, he didn't pay her any mind. Over time, he would sneak up and call out to her from atop her garden wall. Eventually, probably when he recovered, a group of people came to take him away.

Before he left, he promised he would come back for her. However, Madison never saw him again.

The reunion a decade later was unexpected.

It was on her seventeenth birthday. Her half-sister said she had lost a bracelet on the beach and asked Madison to help look for it.

There, on the beach, Madison recognized Grayson at first glance.

The nineteen-year-old boy had shed his boyishness but was laden with a heavy air of melancholy. When Madison saw him, he was slowly walking into the cold, raging sea.

Without thinking, she ran to him and grabbed his arm.

The boy turned around.

His eyes were filled with a coldness and cruelty that belied his age.

Suddenly frightened, Madison took a few steps back.

The boy smirked and turned back toward the sea.

"Death is the cheap way out!" Madison yelled out to him, her voice strained.

His footsteps halted. Then, a wave came crashing in, engulfing Madison's slender figure in the sea.

She couldn't remember exactly what she felt then, only the terrifying sensation of struggling and not being able to cling to anything.

As her consciousness blurred, suddenly, arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her through the churning waves.

She thought she could see the boy's pale, cold cheeks through the water's blur.

She wasn't sure how he managed to drag her ashore amid such tumultuous waves. All she remembered when she opened her eyes again was his indifferent face and his icy words. "If you can't even save yourself, don't bother with others' lives."

With that, he turned and walked away.

"Grayson!" she cried out in her dream.

With the shout, the dream shattered, and she awoke.

Her eyes snapped open to the sound of her ringing phone. The call from Amelia was clear as day.

"You're scheduled for surgery. Don't eat or drink anything."

Madison composed herself before she responded, but her heart was heavy.

This was the child she had created with Grayson. The man she had secretly adored for years. But she knew the child couldn't stay.

It wasn't about being discovered. It was the fear that the longer the child stayed, the harder it would be to let go.

...

After getting her things together, Madison left the hotel. Yet, right there at the hotel entrance, she saw the all-too-familiar car.

She wasn't surprised that Grayson found her. In Horizon City, if he wanted to, there was no one he couldn't see. What puzzled her was why he would bother to look for her.

After last night's decisive conversation, there was no reason for him to see her today. Right now, the last person she wanted to face was Grayson.

She had finally steeled her resolve yet feared it would crumble in his presence.

Madison thought about hiding, but Grayson had already stepped out of his car and was approaching.

His pace was measured, his voice tinged with suppressed anger. "Done playing games?" he stopped in front of her, his expression unreadable, towering over her with an intimidating gaze.

"I wasn't playing games." Madison didn't meet his eyes.

Grayson looked at her deeply. "So, you really want to leave with Nicholas? When did you two start this?"

Madison's lips twitched slightly. "You've got it wrong. I want to leave, and it has nothing to do with anyone else."

"Give me a reason."

Finally, Madison looked up, meeting his stern gaze. "I want to get married, Grayson."

His eyes narrowed sharply. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, serious. I'm already twenty-seven."

Grayson's hand caressed her face, his eyes alight with a dangerous glint. "Do you have someone in mind?"

There was a moment of silence from Madison. "Not yet, but whether I do or don't, I want to leave."

"Made enough money?" Grayson raised his eyebrows at her.

Madison gave a bitter smile. Following him for money had always been her deepest shame. Yet, he kept reminding her.

It took all her strength not to break down in front of him. She managed to smile back at him.

"Not really, but if making money conflicts with marriage, I choose marriage."

Grayson's eyes and eyebrows grew heavy. "Would you really leave me?"

"What's the point if I can't let go? Are you going to marry me? Have a family and kids, Grayson? Will you?"

Madison gazed directly at him, searching. She thought if only he could say "yes." Even an uncertain, far-off "yes," would left her cornered and hopelessly entangled with this man for life.

But Grayson remained silent, his increasingly cold expression speaking volumes of his stance. He took two steps back, his eyes scrutinizing Madison up and down.

"Madison, I always thought you were smart," he said.

A sharp pang shot through Madison's heart at his words. She understood what Grayson meant. A smart woman wouldn't trouble herself this way. Before, she wouldn't have either. Only things were different now—she was pregnant.

Locking eyes with Grayson, Madison retorted, "I apologize, Grayson, I am but an ordinary person."

"If that's the case, I won't insist any further," Grayson spoke and turned to walk away.

It wasn't until Grayson's figure vanished down Cullinan Avenue that Madison, pale-faced, headed to the curb to hail a taxi.

Arriving at the hospital, Amelia was already there waiting for her.

"Let's go. You should get the examination done first."

Madison followed Amelia into the ultrasound room. Afterward, Amelia looked disturbed.

"What is it?" Madison sensed an ominous feeling arising.

Amelia frowned and asked her, "You always had severe menstrual cramps, didn't you?"

"Yes." Madison tensed up, memories flooding back.

She had fallen into the icy sea waters during her period when she was seventeen. The chilling ordeal resulted in severe abdominal pain for days. Ever since then, her periods she had been torturously painful.

"Madison, your health isn't suitable for an abortion."

Madison's fingers clenched tightly; she looked at Amelia, her voice barely a whisper. "Why?"

Amelia met her gaze. "If you go through with this, you might not be able to have children ever again."

The color drained from Madison's face. Her grip on the ultrasound report tightened and tightened still.

"Is there something wrong with my body?"

Amelia nodded. "Let's put it this way—this pregnancy is almost like a one-in-a-million chance for you. Your uterine lining is much thinner than average."

She paused, then added, "I think you should reconsider."

Madison's hand instinctively covered her lower belly. Her mind was a whirlwind of confusion. She had been so certain about terminating the pregnancy. But faced with the possibility of never being able to have children again, her resolve suddenly waned.

This child might be the only one she would ever have in her life.

After a moment of silence, she fought back the pain in her heart and said, "All right, I'll think about it."

Amelia looked at her. "Are things really over with that guy?"

Madison forced a smile, the bitterness almost spilling from her lips. "They truly are."

---