Chapter 48

-James-

**"You Can't Have Her"**

That was the last text I received from Sebastian before I discarded my phone, and knowing Sebastian, he would not stop until he got what he wanted.

"What's wrong?" asked Jianna. She was looking at me with concern on her face.

"Nothing, J." I flashed her a reassuring smile, but she knew I was lying. She always knew.

*"You're not a very good liar you know." *

I can hear her in my head vividly, like she just said it to me.

"You're not a very good liar, you know," Jianna said.

I looked up at her and smiled.

"What?" she grinned.

"You always used to say that." I smiled, reliving a memory.

The smile quickly faded when I remembered why Sebastian was texting me. He wasn't going to let me have her. From the time I saw them both in the restaurant before I regained my memories, I knew he had gotten it bad. Hell! I even told him to go get her even when I was already starting to develop feelings for her. I knew that he was going to have a better life with him. Then the memories came back.

I remembered how happy Jianna and I used to be when we were together. We had a connection that I thought was unbreakable. But when I lost my memory, everything changed. I didn't remember anything, not even her. And I just got her back.

I looked at Jianna, and I knew that I couldn't let Sebastian have her. Not after all that we have been through. I couldn't let him take away the only person that mattered to me.

I remembered the way Jianna's eyes lit up when she saw me. I remembered the way she laughed at my jokes and how she always knew just how to make me smile. I remembered the way she looked in my arms, the way her body fit perfectly against mine. And I knew that I couldn't let Sebastian have her. Not now, not ever.

I looked at Jianna again and saw that same concern in her eyes.

"What's going on, baby?" she asked, her voice soft and gentle. She stroked my hair and caressed my face.

I looked at her, and she had the most amazing eyes. So much beauty, so much love.

"I remembered everything, J. I remembered us and our love for each other." I spoke the truth, every word of it.

Jianna's eyes widened in surprise and then sadness.

"You remembered?" she whispered, her voice barely above a whisper.

I nodded slowly, my heart pounding in my chest. The memories flooded back into my mind like a dam had been broken.

"I remembered how much I love you, J. And I will fight for us, for you, until my last breath," I said, determination and love filling my voice.

Jianna's eyes shimmered with tears as she wrapped her arms around me, holding me tight.

For the first time in a long time, I felt whole and complete. I had my memories back, and I had the love of my life by my side. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but I was ready to fight for us, to fight for our love.

When she let go, she looked down, and she looked like the whole world had just gotten dumped on her.

I held her chin and guided her face to look at me.

"What's wrong?" I asked, tears threatening to fall.

"I don't remember anything James. I want to. God, do I want to. But I just don't remember." she said, I noticed the tears pooling at the corner of her eyes. "You tell me all these things, and I'm trying my best, but I just don't remember."

Jianna sat up and buried her face in her hands. I sat back up, too, and combed my hair out of my face with my fingers.

"It's okay, J. We'll just have to make new memories," I whispered gently, rubbing her back soothingly. "We'll make new memories as special as the old ones."

Jianna looked up at me, tears still streaming down her face. Her eyes searched mine for any kind of doubt. But she found none. She smiled weakly and leaned in to kiss me, her lips warm and soft against mine. I caressed her cheek as we got lost in the kiss.

"I love you, James," she whispered as we broke apart and leaned her forehead against mine.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

"I love you more." I sighed. "I've been wanting to say that ever since I met you. Even before I remembered this, us."

Jianna smiled and leaned in for another kiss, her hands running through my hair. I've always loved when she does that. I can't imagine life without her. I already knew what it was like to forget her. And the moment I thought she died, I died along with her. But now, with her back in my arms, I wouldn't let anything or anyone take her away from me. Not Sebastian, not my past, and certainly not my own fears. I would love her fiercely and protect her with all that I am.

Jianna pulled away and lay her head down on my chest.

"So..." she started as she placed her hand in my shirt and traced the muscles on my pecs. "now that I am thoroughly distracted, why don't you tell me what really is going on?"

I started playing with her hair, a habit I knew she loved and took a deep breath. I didn't want her to be in the dark with the one person who has the means to hunt us down, but at the same time, this is probably not a good time to tell her.

Her hand stopped. "James?"

"J?" I responded back.

"James Elroy Barnes. You're going to tell me what's going on, and you're going to tell it to me now," she demanded playfully but seriously at the same time.

"It's Sebastian..." then my voice trailed off. I just realized something.

"How did you know my middle name is Elroy?" I asked.

"Oh...Ummm...I don't know. It just came out." she said shyly. "Is that your actual middle name?"

"Yes. James Elroy Barnes. No one knew that but you." I answered.

"Baby, your heart is beating so fast," she said. She took her hand out of my shirt and propped herself up. "Are you okay?" The look of concern was evident on her face.

"Yeah. Yes. I'm fine." I responded. "I...It's just that's the first time you ever said anything remotely from our past. Something only you could have known."

Tears were starting to form in my eyes until my eyesight became blurry. "J. Come back to me. Come back to me, baby, okay?" I leaned my forehead against hers. "It doesn't matter how long it takes. Just come back. Please?"

She entangled her hand in my hair and kissed me so passionately that it took my breath away.