Chapter 15

-James-

The best thing about growing up in New York is that I can just wander around aimlessly for hours and not be in the same neighborhood twice. I went to my old haunts in Brooklyn and Queens and then headed uptown to go to Sebastian's building to work out and plan for the upcoming mission he wanted me to lead with his little wannabe army. It's late enough that I'm sure everyone has left already. Sebastian and his little secret.

When I got in front of Sebastian's building, I wandered into the front of the building and looked in to make sure that no one was going to see me come in. Then I saw...her.

She's talking to Cesar. It's her first day and she's already making friends. That's good. I saw Cesar hand her an envelope. She smiled at him, oh god, that smile. What I wouldn't do for her to direct that smile at me.

I tried to get closer so I could look at her a little bit more without her seeing me.

I saw her walk away and open the envelope.

I walked in a little bit more. Just a bit closer.

She read the paper and I started to see her fall.

**NO!**

I ran towards her just in time to catch her.

"Whoa! Whoa! Hey!"

She looked up at me. There it is. There's my girl.

"Jianna. Are you ok? Hey! I got you." I said trying to calm her down. "J, I'm here what happened?"

J-I just called her J. Why did I call her that? It just came out. It was like something I've said a lot before. It rolled off my tongue naturally.

She started crying inconsolably. I took her by the arms and led her to a nearby bench. She told me about what the note said and how she had no idea who it was from. The anger rose in me automatically. I could feel my fists clenching at my sides as she spoke. Someone was trying to hurt her, and I would be damned if I let that happen.

I wanted to keep her in my arms. I wanted to see how far she was going to let her comfort her without pulling away. She always pulls away. I slowly lifted my arm to touch her face. She didn't pull away, she even came closer. I brushed my thumb gently over her cheek, wiping away the tears that trailed down her face. She leaned into my touch and closed her eyes, allowing herself to be vulnerable in front of me.

"Hey..." I said softly, there was a strand of hair covering her face. I gently tucked it behind her ear. I wanted to gaze into her eyes unobstructed. She looked scared but she was calming down. She started telling me about the note again but I couldn't concentrate on what she was saying. All I could think about was how I wanted to protect her and make her feel safe.

"It's ok, J. I'm here. I won't let anything happen to you. I promise," I whispered to her.

"Thank you. Again," she whispered. "You seem to keep catching me in the most unfortunate circumstances. Are you sure you sure you're not stalking me?" she chuckled in between heaves.

I chuckled along with her. "Seems like it." She looked like in better form so I wanted to make sure she wanted me to stay. As much as I want to stay like this, I know that she's vulnerable and I don't want her to think that I'm taking advantage.

"Did you want me to go?" I asked, hoping she'd say no. I would jump if she asked me to jump and all I would ask is "How high?"

"N-no. Please. Can you stay for a little bit?" she looked at me with pleading eyes. "I'll stay for as long as you want me to" I replied.

I placed my arms around her and I led her to the nearest subway station so I could take her home. I kept my arm around her when the train came. I ushered her to an available seat and when I let go of her briefly, she looked back at me to make sure I was still there. As I sat beside her, I put my arms back around her and her face automatically softened. I couldn't help but notice how good she felt in my embrace. It was as if her body molded perfectly into mine like we were made for each other. I wanted to stay in that moment forever, but I knew I had to let her go eventually. She leaned her head on my shoulder, and I could feel her warm breath on my neck. I closed my eyes, relishing the feeling of her hair softly brushing against my cheek.

I tried asking her about the note. I needed to know who I had to kill. But she just shook her head. She doesn't want to talk about it.

"Yeah, I get that. But if someone is following you, or harassing you in any way, you need to tell me. We can get the police involved if needed. I won't let anything happen to you," I said sternly. I felt her body become strained. I felt guilty about the way I just spoke to her. It was cold and she got scared.

"Let's get you home," I suggested. I'm sure she will feel more comfortable in her own home.

We arrived at her apartment building and I walked her to her door. She turned to face me, her eyes searching mine. I took my arm off her, the indentation her body left gave me an instant feeling of emptiness, and she stood by the door. Waiting.

"Thanks for tonight, James. I don't know what would have happened if you didn't show up when you did," she said smiling softly at me. What I wouldn't do for that smile.

"Anytime, J. I guess I'm unlucky that way." I chuckled.

"Oh, I see how it is!" she laughed and she tried to punch me playfully. I saw this as an opportunity to get her back in my arms. I held her by the wrist and pulled her to me. I felt her jolt forward but I caught her and I wrapped my arms around her. My heart was racing and it felt like it was about to burst out of my chest. I was afraid she was going to push me away but she didn't. I felt her arms hug my torso and at that moment I knew I was in trouble. I wasn't going to let her go. Not now.

I softened my embrace and looked down at her. I gazed into her eyes, asking her silently to permit me to kiss her. I can't tell. She looked conflicted like there was an inner monologue going on in her head. Then she stood up and I took that as a sign to let go.

"Thanks for taking me home James. I appreciate what you did for me tonight," she said suddenly impassively. What the hell just happened?!? Did I do something wrong? I didn't understand. So I did what I do best.

"Sure. Anytime, J." I said emotionlessly. My head was racing with so many questions but I couldn't do anything about it so I turned around to leave.

When I was at the bottom of her steps and was about to turn the corner, she called out to me. Did she change her mind? I turned around and looked up at her. I couldn't tell from her face if she wanted me back so I stayed where I was.

"Why do you call me J? I've never told you that it's a nickname or anything. No one else calls me that," she asked. I didn't know the answer either.

"I don't know, it just felt right. It suits you. J." I said sheepishly. It's like that's what I've always called her. Calling her Jianna never felt right to me.

"Oh. Ok. I was just curious. Goodnight James." she said and opened her door.

"Goodnight, Jianna," I said as I saw her go inside.

My heart sank. I didn't know what to do. I started to walk to the corner of the street.

**FUCK IT!**

I turned around and ran back to her house. I knocked on the door hoping she'd open it.

"Who is it?" I heard the tremble in her voice. She's still scared.

"It's James," I said breathlessly

"Oh. Did you forget something?" she asked as she was opening the door.

She saw me panting. Out of nervousness and adrenaline.

"Are you ok James?" she asked with concern in her voice.

"I just need to know something," I said in between breaths.

"What is---" but before she could finish her sentence, I stepped forward and pulled her by the waist. My lips crashed onto hers and I felt a surge of electricity course through my body. I could feel her surprise at first, but it quickly melted away and her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me closer. I had never felt such passion before, and it was clear that it was mutual. I deepened the kiss and felt her lips part slightly, inviting me in. I explored her mouth with my tongue, tasting her sweetness and feeling her moan softly. I pushed her slightly to the nearest wall and lightly pinned her there. I felt her body respond to that so I closed the door with my foot and grabbed her by the hair so I could deepen the kiss some more. Her hands were rousing, and they had set my body alight with a consuming passion the second they touched me. I craved her touch as she explored my body from the inside of my shirt until our skin collided and every particle inside me ignited into pure euphoria. Everywhere her hands roamed, I melted under her touch.

As we broke the kiss, I rested my forehead against hers, staring into her eyes. They were filled with a mix of shock and desire. I knew I had just taken a huge risk, but it was worth it. I had to take that chance.

"I have been wanting to do that since the day I met you," I said breathlessly. I knew her reaction to my kiss was just in the heat of the moment and I wanted to make sure I didn't make her feel guilty as she always does.

"Before you say anything, I don't want anything out of this but I just had to know," I explained.

"James..." My name in her lips is gospel.

"No, it's ok," I said.

I turned around and opened the door but someone was standing there already.

"Sebastian" she gasped