Chapter 62 NO LOVE
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ADELINE
I sat curled up on the couch, my arms wrapped around my legs as I buried my face in my knees. The dim glow of the lamp beside me cast long shadows across the room, but I barely noticed.
My thoughts were a tangled mess, circling the same painful truth over and over again. The image of Vladimir getting tortured made me want to end my life in guilt for not being there for him but …… the pain i also felt for was …… myself and ……
Luciano.
For so many years, I had tried. I had fought for his love, endured his coldness, his silence, his indifference.
I had stood by his side, hoping—praying—that one day, he would see me, truly see me. That he would love me the way I had loved him.
But after everything I had learned… after the truth had come crashing down around me like an avalanche, burying everything I once believed in, I could no longer see a future with him. I could not see …… myself with him. Not anymore.
I lifted my head slightly, exhaling a deep sigh, my heart heavy with the weight of my own realization. Maybe we were never meant to be.
The thought stung, cutting me deeper than I wanted to admit.
I had spent so much of my life trying to fit into his world, trying to mold myself into someone he would want. But what had it given me?
Loneliness. Heartache.
And now, betrayal.
Another sigh escaped my lips as I ran my fingers through my hair, trying to clear the ache in my chest. I didn’t want to think about him anymore. Didn’t want to picture those icy blue eyes that had haunted me for years.
I was so lost in my thoughts that I barely noticed the soft footsteps approaching.
“Adeline?”
I looked up to see Eva standing near the doorway, hesitating. “Can I join you?”
I forced a small smile and nodded.
“Of course.”
Eva walked over, sitting down beside me, tucking her legs under her. We had not introduced ourself properly yet but what I have observed about her is that she really is kind.
There was a moment of silence between us, comfortable yet charged. I could tell Eva had something on her mind, something weighing on her just as heavily as my own thoughts and that she wanted to talk it out to someone.
“You looked deep in thought,” Eva finally said, glancing at me.
I let out a breathy chuckle, shaking my head.
“Just… thinking about things.”
“ boyfriend?”
I looked at her and my heart raced as if she could read me. I hesitated before nodding. “Yeah.”
Eva tilted her head slightly. “Do you love him?”
My chest tightened at the question. Did I? After everything?
“I did,” I admitted softly.
“For a long time. I gave him everything I had. But… love isn’t enough if the other person doesn’t want it.”
Eva frowned. “That sounds painful.”
I let out a bitter laugh. “It is. We were going good after so many bad years but it’s painful” I turned to Eva.
“Have you ever been in love?”
Eva was quiet for a moment before nodding. “Yes.”
I raised a brow, surprised by the sudden vulnerability in Eva’s voice. I smiled and looked at her. Love is a beautiful thing and seeing her getting so shy made me think about myself.
“Who?”
Eva hesitated, then looked away, her fingers fidgeting in her lap. “Charles.”
As soon as she said the name, my eyes widened. “Charles Claude?”
Eva nodded, a small, sad smile tugging at her lips. “I’ve loved him for years.”
That attitude Dev- that sassy asshole. In love?
I was speechless for a moment, staring at Eva as she tried to process the revelation. Charles? The man who exuded power and danger, whose every move was calculated and ruthless?
Seeing Eva—gentle, warm Eva—love someone like him felt like a cruel irony.
“Does he know?” I finally asked.
Eva shook her head.
“No. And even if he did, it wouldn’t matter.”
My heart clenched. I knew that feeling all too well.
Eva offered a small smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes. It broke my heart.
“I know he doesn’t see me that way. And that’s okay. I don’t expect anything from him. I just… I just want to be near him. That’s enough for me.”
My throat tightened.
I had spent so many years feeling the exact same way. Loving from a distance, accepting whatever scraps of attention I could get, telling myself that being near Luciano was enough—even when it was killing me.
I reached over, taking Eva’s hand in mine and squeezing gently.
“I know how that feels.”
Eva glanced at me, her eyes softening. “ your boyfriend is like that too? ”
I nodded, my gaze dropping to our intertwined fingers.
“For so long, I told myself that as long as I could be near him, as long as I could prove myself to him, he would eventually love me. But now… even if he loves me, I don’t know. I think I was lying to myself or if he’s lying to me. ”
Eva sighed.
“Love shouldn’t be that hard.”
“No,” I murmured, my chest tightening.
“It shouldn’t.”
For a moment, we sat there in silence, both lost in our own thoughts.
Then I managed a small smile.
“Even though I don’t like Charles very much, I think he would be a good match for you.”
Eva blinked in surprise before laughing softly. “You think so?”
I nodded. “You’re strong, Eva. Stronger than you think. And if anyone can make Charles feel something real, I think it’s you.”
Eva smiled, her eyes shimmering with something unreadable. “Maybe.”
I exhaled, leaning back into the couch. “Maybe it’s time for us both to stop waiting for men who don’t see us.”
Eva chuckled.
“Maybe.”
And for the first time in a long while, I felt a flicker of something I hadn’t felt in a while.
Hope.
Hope that I could survive in this world without him.