Chapter 80: Eruption

Seraphine's POV

I took a shaky breath.

The cold air bit at my lungs. Made everything sharper. Clearer.

"Or lock me up again? Seal the window again?"

A bitter smile twisted my lips. I felt it pull at my face. Wrong. Ugly.

"I'm getting used to cages anyway."

Something broke inside me.

Laughter bubbled up. Harsh. Manic. Wrong.

It echoed off the stone walls. Bounced back at me like mockery.

"Isn't this funny?"

The laughter grew louder. Sharper. Edged with hysteria.

My shoulders shook. My chest heaved.

"From the moment I stepped into Shadowmere—"

My voice cracked. Splintered.

"I've destroyed everything."

The fire crackled. A log shifted. Sent sparks dancing.

"Stop laughing."

Kaelen's voice cut through. Low. Dangerous. A warning.

His jaw was clenched. Tight. A muscle jumped in his cheek.

But I couldn't stop.

The words kept coming. Wouldn't stop. A flood breaking through.

"The human hunts me outside because I burned their house."

I saw it again. The flames. Orange and hungry. The smoke. Black. Choking.

The laughter turned wild. Uncontrollable.

"Made you break your treaty. Your sacred fucking law."

My vision blurred with tears. Hot tears that burned tracks down my frozen cheeks.

"Then I ran. Like the coward I am."

The memory flashed. That night. The forest. The terror.

"Got caught. Got locked up like an animal."

My throat tightened. Each word like swallowing glass.

"But that wasn't enough, was it?"

The laughter mixed with sobs now. Ugly. Guttural.

"Damien's men came. Because of me."

The guards' faces flashed before my eyes. Blood. So much blood.

"Your wolves died."

My voice rose. Shaking. Breaking.

"Seven guards who had families. Had lives."

I was screaming now through the laughter. The sounds tangling together.

"DEAD. Because I exist!"

"And so does the festival."

A sob tore out of my throat.

The humiliation crashed back. Fresh. Raw.

"Made a fool of myself. Of you."

I saw their faces. The pack. Their disgust. Their hatred.

"Embarrassed you in front of everyone."

"Cordelia—"

Her name broke something else inside me.

"She was kind. The only one who was kind."

Guilt twisted in my gut like a knife.

"And I lied to her. Straight to her face."

The words came faster. Harder. Like poison I needed to purge.

"Then I thought maybe I could do something good."

The school. Those small faces. Their hope.

"Those kids. Those innocent fucking kids."

My voice cracked completely.

"I poisoned them!"

The scream echoed off the walls.

"Vespera set me up and I walked right into it like the idiot I am!"

I couldn't breathe. Couldn't think.

"They trusted me. Ate what I gave them."

Those small hands. Reaching. Smiling. Innocent.

"And they got sick. Because of me."

"Because I'm so fucking stupid—"

"So fucking useless—"

"So fucking cursed—"

Each word was a punch. To him. To me. To everything.

"Orphans who had nothing. NOTHING."

Sobs wracked my body. Violent. Uncontrollable.

"And I hurt them too."

Everything was so fucked. So completely, utterly fucked.

And I couldn't stop laughing. Couldn't stop crying.

The sound filled the room. Bounced off every surface. A mad symphony of pain.

---

The laughter died as suddenly as it started.

Silence crashed down. Heavy. Suffocating.

I stared at Kaelen.

My face wet. Eyes probably red and swollen. My throat raw.

Empty.

I felt nothing. Just hollow. Scraped out.

The fireplace crackled. A log shifted. Sent sparks dancing up the chimney.

"There's a way to fix this."

My voice came out flat. Mechanical. Dead.

"We should find a witch. Break the bond."

The words dropped like stones into still water.

Kaelen's eyes widened.

Shock breaking through his controlled expression. His pupils dilated. His breath caught.

For a moment, he looked almost human. Almost vulnerable.

"You don't know what you're saying."

His voice held something I'd never heard before.

Fear?

His hands clenched at his sides. Knuckles white.

"I don't care about the risks."

I met his stare. Unflinching. Let him see the emptiness in mine.

"I don't care if it kills me."

Truth. Pure truth.

Outside, the wind howled. Threw itself against the windows. Made the glass rattle in the frames.

"I have nothing left to lose."

I gestured between us. At the space where the Bond pulsed weakly.

Like a dying heartbeat. Fading. Failing.

"You'll be free. The pack will be safe."

My throat tightened.

"No more attacks. No more deaths."

Snow pelted the windows. Harder now. The storm picking up.

"Breaking a mate bond—"

Kaelen's voice dropped. Became something darker. More dangerous.

He took a step closer.

The air grew heavier. Thicker. Like trying to breathe underwater.

"It's not like tearing up a contract."

His eyes burned into mine. Dark. Intense. Desperate.

"It could destroy you. Destroy us both."

The fire crackled louder. As if agreeing. Warning.

"Then what?"

My voice rose. Sharp. Desperate.

I could feel my control slipping. Crumbling.

"We stay like this? You hate me. You have Vespera, then why don't you throw me away?"

I threw my hands up. The movement wild. Uncontrolled.

"The pack hates me. People keep dying—"

My voice cracked. Broke into pieces.

"What's the fucking point of any of this?"

The Bond seized.

Violent. Painful.

Like someone had shoved a knife between my ribs and twisted.

Agony rippled through me. Through him.

I saw it flash across his face. His features contorting. Jaw clenching.

Neither of us moved.

The room felt smaller. The walls closing in. The air too thick to breathe.

Outside, the wind picked up. A low howl through the bare trees.

Like wolves crying. Mourning.

---

His silence was the final straw.

Everything inside me snapped.

That last thread. That final piece holding me together.

Gone.

"Fine. I'll do it myself."

My hand shot to my neck.

To the mark. The bond mark that branded me as his.

My fingers found the raised skin. Still sensitive. Still warm.

My nails dug into skin. Deep. Piercing.

Pain flared. Sharp and immediate.

Skin broke. Blood welled up. Warm. Wet.

I felt it trickle down my neck. Into my collar.

I didn't let go. Dug deeper.

The mark burned. Screamed. The Bond thrashing like a dying animal.

"If you won't help, I'll rip it out—"

"Seraphine!"

His roar shook the room.

The window rattled. The fire jumped. Shadows danced wildly across the walls.