Chapter 464 Chapter 464
She watched him through the window as he spoke to Gage in the yard. His posture was stiff, almost to the point of looking hostile. Emersyn didn’t have to be outside to know what they were talking about, Gage looked patient as he spoke, and Noah closed off completely. He was still blaming himself for the latch. Crossing her arms over her chest she watched him, practically studied him. This was the man that kept her from going insane or giving up. She knew nothing about him all these years, only that he had fought for her. He had risked his life for her. She didn’t need to close her eyes to remember how he looked when she saw him that night, it was burned into her memory forever. She had honestly thought she was hallucinating when he came down into that basement—it wouldn’t have been the first time she’d imagined him during a low moment. He’d never spoken in them though, so that should have been her first clue it was real. He was nothing like she’d imagined he would be like. He was so fierce and strong, even if he didn’t think he was.
Whooshing out a breath, she watched him walk toward the little house she was waiting in. His expression told her that he was completely shut down, lost in his head. She chortled to herself, if anyone understood getting trapped in your head, it was her.
He came in and closed the door and then stood there, looking her over from head to toe, completely avoiding eye contact. She bit her lip and forced herself to stand there and suffer his scrutiny for about ten seconds longer than she ever thought possible. “It wasn’t your fault.” She said softly.
His tortured gaze connected with hers. “I should have checked everything.”
“Why was that your responsibility?” She mentally cheered for her quick reply without vibrating like she was going to crumble to the floor. “There are many people living here,” she waved a hand in the air, “many come and go from the other two homes,” she sucked in a quick breath and hoped she didn’t look as nervous as she felt, “why did that fall to you to do?” She had been conditioned to never challenge a male.
His expression changed slowly, as did his breathing. He was fighting the second nature that had been beaten into him too, she thought with satisfaction. “I should have thought of it.” He shook his head, “I told you that you and your child would be safe here…”
“And we are.” She compelled her feet to move her toward the counter so she could pick up the tape. “You found them; the gate is fixed.” She couldn’t look at him for a few seconds while she gathered more courage to hold his stare. “Everything is fine now.” She blew out a breath and then turned and looked at him. He hadn’t moved. She held up the tape, “how do I do this?” Without waiting for a reply, she went over to the window. Could he tell she was holding her breath now? She wasn’t sure, but she did until she heard his boots on the floor.
He stopped a foot from her and reached and gently took the roll from her hand. Pulling out a foot of it, he held it along the wood that lined the window. She watched him, his hands were steady, his breathing wasn’t erratic. She wanted to ask him how he was able to control himself when her cat could sense the anger and anguish rolling through him.
“Are you going to work in here all day?” His voice was soft, and he still wasn’t looking at her.
“As long as I can.” She watched how he lined the tape up with the wall so she would be able to paint right to the edge of it without hitting the trim. “I’d like to get it finished before Cooper wants to put the flooring in.”
Noah’s hands paused, and he cocked his head to the side for a moment, his face hidden from her view. “Just take breaks and don’t forget to eat.” He finally said.
“Once I get out here done, I was going to bring Aspyn in with some toys and give Penny a break.” She clasped her hands in front of her.
“I don’t think Penny minds.” He ripped off the tape and then reached up to the top. She would have to use a ladder to do the rest.
“I just want to get this done for Cooper.”
He huffed out a breath and then lowered his arm, leaving the tape roll dangling from the wall. “Cooper doesn’t want to live in here.” He said it, sounding exasperated and slightly angry at the same time.
“What do you mean?” She looked around the room, “he doesn’t like it, does he?” She closed her eyes and sighed, “he barely said a thing about the choices I made,” she opened her eyes and looked to see he was standing there, his hands on his hips shaking his head.
“I should have told you. He should have told you.” He was looking at the floor, so she wasn’t sure what was happening.
“Told me what?”
“He wasn’t asking you to clean this place up for him to live here,” he looked directly at her, “he wanted it done for us to live here.”
“Us?” She blinked wondering if she’d misunderstood somehow. Her eyes widened, “us,” she motioned between them, “you and me?”
He jerked his head to the side, “and Aspyn.”
Emersyn opened her mouth, then snapped it shut. The three of them living here. “Is it because we’re not actually part of this clan?”
Noah looked surprised, “no. I don’t think any of those others care about that.”
She shrugged, “I don’t know much about clan life or rules.”
“That’s not why.” He inhaled a deep breath and then blew it out, “because we’re mates.” He blurted it out, then looked at her to the floor, then back to her again.
“Oh.” She hugged her arms around his waist, feeling a little awkward now. “Why didn’t he tell me that?”
Noah snorted, “I don’t know,” he rolled his eyes, “he thinks we’ll fix each other,” he lifted his hand and then dropped it again, “that we’ll find happily ever after or whatever.”
She almost smirked at his description. “I, uh, don’t think such a thing really exists.”
He nodded and looked at the window, “would you have still done it if he’d told you why?”
She watched him look all around her, but not directly at her. Would she? “I think I would have, yes.”
He didn’t mask the surprise from his face before she saw it.
“I’ve never felt useful,” she stared at him, hoping his gaze would eventually connect with hers again, “I enjoy doing it.”
“Keeping busy helps with,” he wiggled his fingers beside his head. With slow, hesitant movement, he lifted his eyes to look at her, “I’m surprised you’re not upset.”
“Because he wants us to live here?”
“No, because we didn’t tell you.”
She had to move, “Is that why you looked so annoyed when you came in here last night.” She opened the cupboard; she already knew was empty and looked in it.
“Yeah, but not that you were doing it, just-just...”
“That Cooper didn’t tell me why?”
He started to nod, then scowled and pulled his phone out. His expression lightened quickly, as he raised it to his ear. “Ed? Do you need me over...” his coloring paled and he looked at the floor, “when?” His eyebrows went up, “now?” He nodded, a vacant look on his face. “Okay.” He slid his finger over the screen and looked down at the phone.
“Is everything all right?”