Chapter 90

I wondered if something had gone wrong somewhere. Or was it the period?

Cecil still ignored my questions as she climbed up the stairs with her drink. She wouldn't stop no matter what I said, so I just kept quiet and followed her into her room.

She almost slammed the door on my face, and that was when I lost it.

“Can you please fucking answer me? Did I do something wrong? What did I do?” I slammed the door shut behind me and turned to see her glaring at me.

“When were you going to tell me about you and Alpha Victor?”

I felt my heart drop to my feet.

"About me and Alpha Victor?"

“Yes, don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about,” she snapped, her eyes blazing with anger and I could already feel my heart trying to slip out.

She knew?

How the fuck did she know?

I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. “Cecil, uh... Why do you think Victor and I are a thing?”

She scoffed, downing another shot of vodka. “Oh, please. Do you think I’m blind?” She sighed. “When I got tired of staying in my room while the party was booming downstairs, I decided to just go downstairs and join them.” She went back to being an angry bird. “And then I saw you acting too close to him, you cared too much for someone who goes through abuse every day.”

I rubbed my palm over my face, sighing. “Look, I can explain.”

“Does Damon know you're fucking his father?” She whispered the last part. “Look, Ana, I know you are going through a lot, but do you actually think sleeping with your abusive husband's father is a good thing? It doesn't even make any sense.”

I glared at her. “Yeah, it doesn't, same way it doesn't make sense and hurts when he slept with my best friend and wasn't remorseful about it. When he brought a woman into our bedroom knowing fully well I was going to come back home. And when he killed my child. So, on the contrary, it makes perfect sense that I am sleeping with his father. Don't judge me.” I gave her a pointed look, almost wishing she never saw us and the discussion wasn't happening.

“I'm not judging you.”

“Yes, you are.”

She shook her head, dropping the bottle and shot glass on the nearest table and sitting on the bed. “I am not judging you, Ana, but you're not like him, you shouldn't be like him. Heck, when things blow up, there is no way you're getting out of it unscathed.”

I knew.

I knew I wasn't going to be lucky if things blew up, but I had thought about it and I knew what I was in for.

I knew how things would end, I foresaw it.

I was on earth, so I knew what happened to women who finally decided to stand up for themselves and chase their happiness. I knew.

“Look, I know you care about me. But you don’t understand the whole picture. Damon has put me through hell, through actual fucking hell. Victor is... he’s different. He makes me feel like I matter, he makes me feel loved, he makes me happy.”

She sighed deeply. “Ana, I get it. I do. But think about what you're risking. Your safety, your sanity. What happens if Damon finds out? You sure know he’s not just going to sit back and do nothing.”

I walked to the bed. “I’ve thought about it. Every single day. I know the risks. But I can’t keep living like this. I need something, someone, to make me feel alive again.”

She looked at me with a mix of sadness and frustration. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt. More than you already have.”

“I know you don’t,” I said softly, sitting on the ottoman next to the bed. “And I appreciate that. But I have to do this. For me.”

She looked away, staring at the kitchen's direction, obviously lost in thought. I kept quiet, waiting for her to say something. Anything.

Her opinion really mattered, not that I'd leave Victor, if she asked me to, but I lost Penelope and I wasn't planning to lose her, not now, not ever. She was one of the best thing that happened to me these past months. So yeah, her opinion mattered.

She finally turned back t me, sighing. “Do you love him?”

Love? I wasn't sure, but I'd spend an entire month with him and I won't get bored or tired.

I didn't want to say I wasn't sure yet or Cecil might just blow up the entire building so I just went with the saving answer in my head.

“Yeah, I think so” I muttered the last part but I was sure she heard me.

“Fine then, that's what matters. Just promise me you’ll be careful. And if things get too dangerous, you’ll walk away. No matter how hard it is, no matter how much you love him.”

Would I be able to do that?

I nodded. “I promise.”

She hugged me tightly, and I could feel the tension between us easing a bit. “I love you, Ana. You’re like a sister to me. I just want you to be safe.”

“You know I love you too. And I promise, I’ll be as careful as I can.”

We pulled apart, and she gave me a small smile. “Now tell me, is he good?” She asked, her signature smug smile appearing on her face.

“Good? What do you me–”

Ohhhhh.

She asked again. “Is he good? Like in bed. With how giant he is, I'm sure he's big and good” She huffed. “That must be the reason why you like him. I mean he's hot, but he looks dangerous so, he's a no for me, I like my men simple and also big, you know I like big things...” She continued rambling.

And gross!