Chapter 31: Pain, Pain, Pain.

Bella’s pov.

‘Tundra?’ I whispered in my mind, wondering where my wolf has been hiding since we’ve been back home.

Her presence is quiet, hidden.

I’ve barely heard a few sentences from her and she’s usually so talkative, so present. It’s odd.

‘I’m here, healing,’ she whispered softly, sounding tired. Making my soul feel at ease at her presence again.

I felt her pull away just as quickly as she spoke, curling into herself in the darkest parts of my mind.

As I laid in bed all I could think about was back to dinner with John.

It’s one in the morning and all I can think about is how great he was with Megan. And how much she loved him.

‘Everyday,’ his words kept repeating in my mind.

His hand gripping my leg, squeezing it as I moaned from the taste of the food he made me…

Thoughts I don’t want in my head right now.

I clenched my thighs together involuntarily, groaning at myself from the things John made me do.

And then my mind drifted to what the goddess had said.

‘Your second chance is right in front of you.’

I don’t think I want a second chance mate…

And if I did… I think I’d want it to be John. Not some random guy I don’t know, look how that ended up for me last time… with Garret. My goddess given mate who had so easily broken my heart and abandoned me and his own child…

Megan fell asleep instantly after John had tucked her in and read her a bedtime story, the things I usually do for her at night. But she insisted on John doing it tonight. Which hurts my heart if I’m being honest.

She also insisted on John staying the night. On the couch. Just outside my bedroom.

I pushed the blanket off of me, getting onto my feet. Wanting to see if he’s asleep or awake. Not just wanting to know… needing to know.

I opened my door slowly, trying my best not to make any sounds.

My heartbeat was the only thing I could hear, it’s wild rhythm pounding behind my ribcage.

I stepped carefully around the creaky floor boards, knowing just which ones to avoid.

Peaking my head around the corner, seeing John's peaceful face, sound asleep, wrapped in a fuzzy blanket.

I walked closer towards him… wanting to see his face up close. So peaceful, so still.

So unapologetically beautiful.

I stopped in front of him, kneeling onto the ground to be eye level with him… for once.

I studied his face. Noticing every little detail from the small scar beside his lip to the beauty mark on his neck.

How his nose is straight, and his lips are thin and pink.

His hair is slightly longer than usual with little curls at the end of it.

And his eyebrows… perfectly shaped identical eyebrows.

I’m almost jealous of how perfect he is.

He shifted around, the blanket that was on him falling to the side, revealing his muscular chest.

It’s smooth with no hair except for the treasure trail of hair going down his stomach from his belly button to…

“You’re awake,” his deep, sleepy voice said, making me jump up from the ground.

“I- I couldn’t sleep…” I stuttered out, taking a few steps away from him as my entire body felt like it was on fire at being caught admiring him.

John chuckled at my reaction as he sat up, the blanket falling completely off of him, revealing his boxers and chiselled legs.

I felt my body heat up even more if that was possible, my thighs clenching together.

“What’s keeping you up?” He asked as he rubbed his eyes, trying to get rid of the sleep in them.

“Oh, I don’t know,” I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes at his question, shuffling on my feet to distract myself from the heat coursing through my veins.

He laughed again, looking at me with his piercing green eyes.

“It’s the challenge in the morning, isn’t it?” He said softly, putting his hand out towards me.

I hesitated before placing my hand in his, allowing him to pull me down beside him on the couch.

I sighed as I got comfortable, leaning on his side slightly.

“Yes, it is. I’m nervous… we didn’t really get to train all too much,” I mumbled, rubbing my hand up and down my arm out of habit from my nerves, feeling every single one sticking out from my fear.

“You’ll be fine,” he said casually while nodding his head, not seeming nervous at all, “you got this. Ethan isn’t the strongest alpha out there. I’m confident in yours and Tundra's skills.”

I huffed, blowing a strand of hair out of my face as I leaned back, “yeah. I know he’s not the strongest but Garret must be helping him… it’s the only reasonable explanation on how Ethan knew to challenge me.”

He clicked his tongue, crossing his arms on his chest, the veins on his forearms bulging.

I stared at them before tearing my eyes away, not wanting to be caught again.

“That’s true… but you have the one thing he doesn’t,” he said quietly, looking at the side of my face.

I looked towards him then, assessing the look on his face.

He looked so sure, so confident.

“And what is that?” I said just as quietly, feeling our bodies moving closer together.

“Me. He doesn’t have me,” he responded, closing the distance between us, smashing his lips against mine hungrily.

His tongue slipped into my mouth, pulling me closer to him.

I moaned softly from the feeling of him.

Getting lost in the moment…

Until I was being pulled away, groaning in pain.

I fell off of the couch, hitting my head on the table on my way down.

“Bella!” John gasped, reaching for me but I fell too fast, he couldn’t grab me quick enough.

I gasped out in pain, my insides feeling like they were burning. Melting.

“What the hell is happening to you!?” He said frantically, rolling me onto my back, cradling my bleeding head in his hands.

Tears rolled out of my eyes rapidly, the pain too much.

I clenched my teeth, gripping my stomach hard. Trying to get rid of the pain.

But it doesn’t go away, it only gets worse. So much worse.

I cried out, clutching John's hand tightly. Hearing him wince.

But he doesn’t pull away, he pulls me closer, holding my body against his as if he could shield me from the pain.

“G-Garret,” I stuttered over my cries, knowing in my soul he’s fucking Rose right now.