Chapter 25: Ada's Mate
Ada
Tears of anger stream down my face and I wipe them away blindly. I cannot go to my quarters right now. I just do not have it in me to face my friends in this condition. I never told them any of this and I do not want to do it now.
Without thinking about it, I walk outside towards the cliff. Dad placed a bench there with Mother’s name engraved on it. I went there often as a child and it became my special place when things became too much for me. For the first time in many years, I feel alone and abandoned.
I stare at the ocean as I inhale the salty air.
“Mom,” I whisper to the wind. “I need you so much right now.”
I close my eyes and pretend that she is sitting next to me. She would pull me into her embrace and whisper, this too shall pass.
“I like them both,” I confess to the wind. “F*ck knows why I like Blake. He’s an assh*le, but … he was there when Clyde came into my room, and he protected me. I got a glimpse of his playful side at the caves. There’s more to him than this cynical brute act he’s keeping up, he’s just caught up in his pain. And it was so exciting to kiss him. But Reese is easy-going and uncomplicated. And he doesn’t have mood swings. He’s so supportive and understanding. And he knows how to make magic with my body.”
I chuckle self-consciously at the memory of me and Reese in the car. But the euphoria lasts only for a second before it evaporates.
“Mommy,” I start sobbing as I cover my face with my hands. “I’m so tired of hurting and fighting to stay afloat. I thought I was over the things Clyde did to me. But all my fears and anxiety returned when he came into my room again. I cannot go through that again. I’m not a defenceless child anymore but Clyde is more devious and eviler than before. What else is he capable of if he can plant a bomb? I’ve been his target since he set foot in this castle and it’s exhausting to always stay alert.”
I stand up and walk closer to the cliff. Beneath me, the water crushes angrily against the rocks.
“I blamed you for so long, Mom,” I say as I stare at the water. “Taking your own life and leaving me and my brothers to fight for ourselves. But now … I don’t know what you had to deal with, but I think I would’ve understood. I understand now. To no longer feel …”
“Don’t do it!”
The voice startles me and I swing around. My ankle twists painfully and I lose my footing. Frantically I grasp at the rocks as I start falling.
Blake
“Ada!”
My blood runs cold as she slides down the cliff and I leap forward. Suddenly my wolf breaks through and I bite into her arm just in time. My hindlegs dig into the rocks as I pull her back up. She cries and screams in pain, but I do not let go of her until we are a safe distance from the cliff.
The moment I let go of her she clamps her bleeding arm and curls into a ball. Quickly I shift back and pull her onto my lap.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper urgently, pulling her closer to my chest. “I’m so, so incredibly sorry.”
I close my eyes and swallow hard as the scene replays in my head. I felt bad about how we left things and followed her to apologise. I gave her space when she talked to herself and could not hear anything. I only went closer when she started crying. It nearly broke me when I learned how much Clyde’s actions affected her.
“I wasn’t going to jump,” she cries softly, clinging to her arm.
“I’m sorry, I …”
“My arm hurts,” she sobs as she curls into a tighter bundle.
“Let me see,” I say softly as I gently examine her arm. “Nothing seems torn or damaged, but it might be a good idea to let the doctor check it out.”
“Don’t be mad, okay,” I say as I rip the bottom of her camisole to wrap around the bitemarks to stop the bleeding.
“Now I’m completely broken,” fresh tears overcome her, and I pull her closer to me.
“I will make this up to you,” I place a kiss on her forehead. “I swear. I will carry you everywhere and serve you until you’re healed.”
I only realize what I have said and done when she goes eerily quiet and stiff in my arms.
“How much did you hear?” She asks cautiously.
“I heard that you’re tired of fighting and that your mother committed suicide,” I admit softly. “That’s why I thought you were going to jump.”
“Okay,” she nods and I cannot tell if she believes me or not.
“You got your wolf,” she looks at me with big eyes as if it only registered with her now.
“I did,” I smile brightly. “And just in time.”
“And you’re naked,” she gasps and tries to get off my lap, but I pull her closer.
“It’s safer if you don’t move,” I warn her.
“Can you tell if I’m your mate?” She avoids eye contact and keeps her gaze on my chest.
“No,” I place my finger under her chin and raise her face so that I can look her in the eye. “And I’m grateful about that.”
“Why?” She frowns. “Your agony would be over if you knew.”
My fingers glide over her cheek until they settle behind her neck. I do not say a word as I lean forward and kiss her softly. Her lips are warm and responsive under mine and satisfaction swirls through me.
“I fear the outcome,” I confess against her lips.
“You’re confusing me,” she says urgently and I know she is over the initial shock from her fall and close to her old fighting self. And I am not ready to go back to bickering. So, I kiss her again.
But this time I kiss her with the desire I have been harbouring towards her from the moment I saw her. The same desire that I have been denying from the very beginning. And I would still have been fighting it if something did not snap inside me when I thought that she wanted to end it all. She does not protest when I leave kisses across her jawline to her neck. I graze my teeth over the spot where she will be marked, and she shivers slightly in my arms.
My hand finds its way underneath her torn camisole and roams up her chest. But I do not touch her breasts. I only glide my finger slowly along the lace of her bra. Goosebumps follow my finger’s trail, and she pushes closer to me.
Her eager response is pushing me closer to the point where I will toss everything to the wind and take her right here and right now. And as much as I want to, it will be unfair to her.
“Ada,” I murmur as I pull her close to my chest. “I want to apologise for being a jerk towards you.”
“This is what my mate did to me,” I take her hand and put it on my scar. “The idea of being so vulnerable ever again is unbearable. But lately, jealousy towards my best friend overshadows the fear of betrayal. Reese is a great guy and deserves a mate like you. But I cannot let go of the small possibility that you could be mine. I’m not excusing myself, I …”
“You don’t need to explain,” she smiles as she traces her finger along my scar. “I understand why you don’t want a mate.”
“Didn’t,” I correct her. “Now, I’m not so sure. As harsh as it sounds, I meant everything I said in the past. But when I thought you were going to jump … something caved inside me, and I realized I was mean to you because I didn’t want to like you.”
“Does this mean you’re going to stop fighting with me?” She looks at me with her beautiful green eyes and my heart crumbles.
“No,” I smile and peck on the lips. “I will continue fighting you when you’re doing something stupid.”
“I don’t do stupid things,” she says indignantly as she sits up and it does not go unnoticed when she flinches in pain. Quickly I mind link Cooper and ask him to bring clothes.
“Yes, you do,” I kiss her again. “Like standing too close to a cliff. Or dress provocatively to gather information.”
“Hey, that plan works,” she protests.
“Or accuse your cousin without proof,” I continue.
“But I was right,” she insists.
“Yes, dear,” I mock her, and she slaps me on the shoulder.
“Ouch, dammit,” she complains as she grabs her arm. “I forgot about this injury.”
“Come on,” I help her off my lap. “Cooper is almost here.”
“I heard my name,” Cooper shouts from the shadows. “Where are you?”
“Over here,” I yell back as I stand up and turn my back towards Ada. I have confessed enough for tonight. She does not need to see the hard evidence she has on me.
“No peeksies,” I whisper.
“You’re such a child,” she rolls her eyes at me, laughing softly and the sound is music to my soul.