Chapter 88
The car door slammed shut with a finality that made Prince Rian jump. Lui leaned across the dashboard to check the mirrors for the third time, trying not to let his nerves crawl too visibly to the surface. Thess was already bouncing in the back seat, eyes wide, hands tapping eagerly on the headrest in front of her.
“This is incredible,” she said, practically vibrating with excitement. “There are so many buttons. What happens if I press one?”
“Don’t,” Lui said without turning. “Seriously. Don’t press anything.”
Prince Rian sat beside her, stiff and deeply suspicious, his hand resting on the hilt of a decorative dagger he'd refused to leave behind. “Why are we in a metal box? Is this a prison cart?”
“It’s a car,” Queen Henriette said from the driver’s seat, buckling herself in with the triumphant air of someone who had once slain a dragon and now believed she could also conquer a minivan. “A beast of steel and rubber. Trust me, you’ll love it.”
“You failed your driving test four times,” Lui muttered, strapping himself into the front passenger seat like a man preparing for death.
Queen Henriette waved him off. “Five. But the last one wasn’t entirely my fault. That squirrel came out of nowhere.”
“You drove onto a sidewalk,” Lui said flatly. “Twice. The examiner jumped out of the car before you even parked.”
She turned the key in the ignition. The engine roared to life, sending a small thrill through the car, and a larger one through Queen Henriette, who grinned like a child handed the controls to a spaceship.
Thess shrieked with joy. “IT LIVES!”
“It awakens,” Queen Henriette said solemnly, placing one hand on the steering wheel and the other reverently on the dashboard. “Good beast. Take us to our kin.”
Lui groaned. “Please don’t talk to it like it’s sentient.”
“But how does it know where we want to go?” Prince Rian asked suspiciously, glancing at the touchscreen glowing on the dashboard.
“It doesn’t,” Lui said. “That’s why I’m inputting the address. Do not touch anything. Just, just sit still.”
Queen Henriette gave the car a pat like it was a loyal steed, then yanked the gear into reverse with a victorious flourish.
The car lurched backward.
Thess whooped. Prince Rian clutched the door handle.
“Oh gods, it's moving,” he said. “Should it be shaking like this?”
“It’s fine,” Queen Henriette said, trying to keep the wheel straight as she reversed down the driveway at an angle that made Lui bite his lip. “It’s just nervous. This one hasn’t been out in a while.”
“You're the one making it nervous,” Lui muttered. “Slow down. You’re not jousting.”
They hit the road a minute later, after a sharp turn that earned an audible honk from a neighbor pulling out of their driveway.
Thess was craning her neck to see everything at once. “This is like being inside a mechanical dragon! Only faster. And louder. And it smells like... what is that? Burnt lightning?”
“Exhaust,” Lui said through gritted teeth. “That’s just the city.”
“Beast! Faster!” Queen Henriette called to the car, pressing the gas pedal just a little too hard, making Henriette chuckle.
The car jumped forward. Prince Rian let out a strangled yell and braced both hands on the dashboard.
“TOO FAST,” Lui snapped, reaching for the handle above the window like a lifeline. “You have to slow down on side streets. There are speed limits!”
Queen Henriette shrugged. “Numbers are a guideline, not a command.”
“They’re the law.”
She grinned. “Not in a war chariot, they’re not.”
“THIS ISN’T A WAR CHARIOT!”
A child on a scooter passed by on the sidewalk. Queen Henriette waved to them like a queen greeting peasants from horseback.
“Civilians respect the roar of power,” she said proudly.
Meanwhile, Thess was trying to roll down the window manually and shouting at pedestrians as they passed.
“We’re in a machine that runs on fire and rage! Fear us!”
“STOP TELLING PEOPLE THAT,” Lui barked.
Prince Rian, whose face had now drained of all color, leaned over to Lui. “Does it ever… stop trembling like this?”
Lui looked at him, deadpan. “That’s the engine. It’s supposed to do that.”
Prince Rian nodded solemnly, then clutched the door again as Henriette took a turn so hard one of the cupholders flung an empty bottle onto the floor.
“You drive like a mad sorceress,” he said flatly.
“Thank you,” Queen Henriette said, pleased.
Lui pressed his hand to his temple. “Okay. Okay. I need everyone to shut up for thirty seconds or I’m going to have a cardiac event.”
Silence fell. For exactly three seconds.
Then Thess leaned forward, grinning. “Does this beast fly?”
“NO,” Lui shouted. “Absolutely not.”
Henriette tilted her head. “Well, it might if we go fast enough and hit a good ramp,..”
“NO!”
Eventually, after several near-death experiences, a minor detour through a Starbucks drive-thru (where Queen Henriette ordered everyone “mystic potions of bean water”), and Prince Rian’s intense philosophical debate with the drive-thru speaker, they arrived at their destination.
The car came to a stop with a squeal of brakes and a sharp jolt that made Lui’s teeth click together.
Silence settled.
Thess was beaming. “Again. Let’s do that again.”
Prince Rian looked like he’d aged a decade. “I have seen the end of days. And it is metal and fury.”
Queen Henriette unbuckled, grinning with satisfaction. “See? Not so bad.”
Lui stumbled out of the car, hand on his chest. “I need to lie down.”
But Henriette was already opening the back door, her expression shifting back to something serious, something focused.
She looked up at the quiet little house where Lurick waited.
“It’s time,” she said softly. “Let’s go.”
And despite everything, the chaos, the screaming, the multiple traffic violations, everyone followed her.