Chapter 29 Mountain of Regret
JAIME’S POV
The pack house felt empty.
I stood in my office, the one where Arya had worked tirelessly for five years while I barely acknowledged her existence and felt the absence like a physical wound.
Three days since she’d left.
Three days since I’d signed those papers, ending our marriage with a few strokes of a pen.
Three days of realizing what I’d lost.
“Alpha?” My new temporary assistant stood in the doorway. Martha, an older pack member who’d agreed to take over until we found a permanent replacement.
Except there was no replacing Arya.
I’d learned that the hard way over the past seventy two hours.
“The suppliers are asking about the northern border contracts,” Martha continued. “They said Luna Arya usually handles these?”
“She did.”
“Well, I don’t know where the files are, and the system she created…” Martha looked helpless. “It’s incredibly complex. I can’t make sense of it.”
Of course she couldn’t. Arya had designed a system so efficient that pack business ran like clockwork. I’d taken it for granted. Taken HER for granted.
“I’ll handle it,” I muttered.
“Also, the council is asking about the training schedules. Apparently Luna Arya managed the rotation and—”
“I SAID I’ll handle it!”
Martha flinched. I immediately felt like shit.
“I’m sorry. It’s not you. Just… give me the files. All of them. I’ll figure it out.”
She left quickly, clearly relieved to escape my presence.
I sank into my chair, staring at the mountain of work that had accumulated in just three days. Work that Arya had handled seamlessly while I ignored her, planning her replacement with Elira.
Elira. My wolf snarled at the thought of her.
She’d been around constantly since Arya left, trying to “help,” offering to take over Luna duties. Every interaction made me want to physically remove her from the pack house.
“Jaime!” Speaking of the devil. Elira’s voice carried from the hallway. “I brought lunch!”
She swept in without knocking, carrying a basket like we were having a fucking picnic.
“I’m busy.”
“You need to eat.” She started unpacking containers. “And we need to discuss the Luna ceremony. I was thinking three months would be appropriate—”
“No.”
She paused, looking at me like I'd spoken in a foreign language. “No, what?”
“No to the ceremony. No to the Luna position. No to us.” I finally looked at her. “What the hell was I thinking?”
I hadn’t meant for that to slip out but control hasn’t been my best forte these past few days.
“Jaime—”
“You staged an attack on my pack. You manipulated me. You helped destroy my marriage.” The fury I’d been suppressing boiled over. “And I LET you. I was so caught up in what the council wanted, what tradition demanded, that I forgot the one person who actually mattered.”
“She was weak,” Elira said dismissively. “The pack needed—”
“The pack needed HER!” I stood, slamming my hands on the desk. “She was holding this entire operation together while I played Alpha. She was the one maintaining relationships, managing logistics, keeping everything running. And I treated her like she was invisible.”
“You’re just guilty—”
“I’m DEVASTATED!” The word came out as a roar. “I lost the best thing that ever happened to me because I was too stupid and too proud to see what was right in front of me.”
Elira’s expression hardened. “You signed the papers. It’s done. Now we can move forward—”
“There is no WE.” I moved around the desk, getting in her face. “You need to leave. Now. And don’t come back.”
“The council—”
“The council can go to hell. Along with their expectations and their plans and their manipulation.” I headed for the door. “Get out of my pack house, Elira. You’re no longer welcome here.”
“You’ll regret this!”
“I already regret plenty. One more thing won’t make a difference.”
I left her standing there, fury radiating from her, and didn’t look back.
Outside, I shifted without thinking. My wolf needed to run. I needed to DO something with this clawing desperate feeling in my chest.
‘Mate,’ my wolf whimpered. ‘Find mate. Bring her home.’
‘She’s not our mate anymore,’ I told him. Each word feels like a dagger to my heart. ‘We lost that right.’
‘Then EARN it back!’
‘How? She’s claimed by a Lycan King. The most powerful male in existence. What do I have to offer that could compete with that?’
My wolf had no answer.
I ran until my muscles screamed, until exhaustion dulled the ache. But it was still there when I shifted back. Still there when I returned to the empty pack house.
Still there when I passed the Luna’s suite and smelled the faint trace of her scent still lingering in the air like it belonged there. Just like she did but I hadn't appreciated her. Lavender and something uniquely Arya.
I pushed open the door, even though I knew I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t stop myself.
The room was exactly as she’d left it. Neat, organized, with small personal touches that made it hers. Books stacked by the bed. A photo of her and her grandmother on the dresser. The comforter she’d always wrapped herself in against the cold she never could shake.
I picked up one of her sweaters, the soft fabric smelling faintly of her.
And I broke.
I broke down, sinking onto her bed with her sweater clutched to my chest, and cried for the first time since I was a child.
I cried for what I’d destroyed. For the woman who’d loved me when I gave her nothing in return. For five years of chances I’d wasted.
For the mate I’d never deserved and never would again.
‘I’m sorry,’ I whispered to the empty room. ‘God, Arya, I’m so sorry.’
The door creaked. I looked up to find Ryker standing there, I'd almost sat up when their form fully formed and I saw it wasn't him.
It was Cyrus, Silver Creek’s Alpha, his expression a mixture of pity and disgust.