Chapter 113

Holding my baby in my arms was surreal. In a moment, everything changed. Yet, here I was, holding my newborn son who had been swaddled in fire silk—a type of material that self warms.

“What will you name him?” Ciera asked, as she adjusted the pillows around me.

Name? Darren said he didn’t care what I named him, and yet … I couldn’t. Not without Darren. This was something we were supposed to do together. I stared down at my sleeping baby. Finally, he was in my arms, but I couldn’t be happy. My family was not complete. I didn’t know where Darren was. What if he was hurt? What if he needed me? No, I couldn’t name him.

“For now, I’ll call him Baby Ren. Until his father and I can come up with a name together.” He was my little Darren, and that would be his name. He had dark hair, and when he opened his eyes, they were just like his father’s.

Ciera didn’t press. She simply nodded, her hand lingering on my shoulder before she busied herself with setting up the nursery. I could hear the clink of glass, the quiet rhythm of her moving through her task. The scent of baby powder filled the room, some spilling out on the changing table. Baby Ren let out a soft cry, reminding me that time hadn’t frozen just because mine had.

Outside, the wind shifted. The chimes on distant porches whispered, delicate and fleeting. Baby Ren stirred in my arms, his tiny fingers curling slightly as if reaching for something unseen. I pressed a kiss to his forehead, feeling both love and heartache at the same time.

“We have a thunder of our best dragons searching for him,” Ciera said quietly, not turning around. “They will find him.”

My throat tightened. It had been the same thing since I arrived. They’d been searching for Darren but couldn’t find him. I was going to have to find him, but with Baby Ren, it would be more difficult.

It was driving me crazy. Darren … I need you. Darren, I’m ordering you to come to me!

My eyes shot open and I sat up hastily. My mind was in a daze, and I blinked. I glanced down to my empty arms and still-pregnant belly. It was a dream. A dream that was too close to reality.

“Allissa, easy.” Ciera was by my side, placing her hand on mine. “You were just having preparation contractions. The time is close. It could be any day now to weeks. It‘s hard to tell with magic involved. But—”

“I need to find Darren.” I swung my legs over to the side and listened to Gunnar chuckle as he walked up to Ciera. He placed his hands on her shoulders and then gave me a warm smile.

“You’ve brought my mate back to me. You’ve given my son his mother back. I want to reward you. I have my men searching for the Lycan King. These are the best hunters around, and—”

“And no offense, but you’ve been searching for him since I was brought here. You still can’t find him, but I can. I am his twin flame. I need to hunt my mate down.” I left no room for objection. I was going after Darren. It had been long enough, and I couldn’t wait any longer.

“Please try to understand … we can’t allow that.” Gunnar slowly shook his head.

“Gun.” Ciera looked up at him and I could see she was asking him on my behalf through mental words. But he kissed her forehead and shook his head.

“Your child could arrive at any moment. You need to be safe.”

“Send Squall with me then. Just let me lead them to him. I don’t have to fight, but—”

“We don’t know what you would find. I won’t allow the last memory of your mate to be tarnished.”

I felt as if he’d kicked me in the chest. What did that mean? Did he think Darren was dead and mutilated? I knew for a fact he was alive.

“He’s alive. I can feel him, and—”

“And who knows what condition he’s in.”

“Listen, Puff, if my mate is in danger, regardless of his condition, I need to go to him. This task seems to be too much for the dragons. You can’t find him, but I will.” I could see he wasn’t going to agree. Honestly, it pissed me off. I didn’t need his permission, but I was a prisoner here. What a way to secure an alliance, right? Making the Lycan Queen their prisoner. “I’m not your prisoner,” I snapped, the words tasting like fire on my tongue. “I’m your ally. Or I was. Starting to feel like I don’t want an alliance with dragons anymore.”

Gunnar’s jaw tightened. He looked at me then, really looked at me, and I saw a flicker of something—guilt, maybe. Or fear. Not for himself. For me. But I didn’t care. Not right now. Not with Darren out there.

“I understand your frustrations. If it was Ciera, I would want to be out there too.”

“Then help me,” I pleaded, quieter now, but no less fierce. “Don’t cage me. Don’t clip me. Darren is out there, and if he can’t come to me, then I have to go to him. There is no way he wouldn’t come for me. Something is wrong! I’m not asking to fight,” I added, holding Gunnar’s gaze. “I’m asking to find him. You say your people are the best. Great. Then they can follow me.”

A low rumble vibrated from Gunnar’s chest, more dragon than man. His eyes flared with his beast for a heartbeat. “And if following you leads you into a trap? If your connection to him is being used against you? Think, Allissa. Losing the king would be horrible, but losing you both? That would be devastating. The Lycan Kingdom may not ever recover from it.”

“I see you’re not very confident in your warrior’s skills then, if they can’t keep me safe.” I raised my brows and watched as a small smirk spread across his lips.

“This is how I know we’re going to get along great.” Ciera smiled at me proudly and then looked up at Gunnar in triumph. She was rooting for me the entire time, and it looked like I just won my argument. But then his eyes changed, and he shook his head.

“Sorry, but I can’t. You’ve overcome your trial. It’s up to Darren to overcome his own.”

Wait a damn minute … what? “How do you know Darren has a trial and this is it?”

“The same reason Ciera knew she was your trial. It isn’t that I won’t let you leave here, but I’ve been ordered not to let you leave here. You can only leave here with Darren. Otherwise, you will stay until after the war has ended. The gods never said the dragons couldn’t search for Darren, so that’s what we’ve been doing. I’m sorry, but I can’t allow you to leave. We don’t want the wrath of the gods upon us.”

I slumped back against the bed and let out a breath. So all of this was the gods’ doing?! Why? Seriously … why? Why were they meddling in my life so much? What were they hoping for? The only thing I could think of was they wanted to awaken something inside us. Like how I learned to control my lightning powers. At first, the lightning was wild and it happened randomly. But now, I could feel it inside me. I was confident I could call upon it and wield it when I needed it. Almost like throwing someone who can’t swim in water. Swim or drown. It was a cruel teaching method, but it could be effective.

Swim or drown. That’s what this was.

I stared up at the stone ceiling like it held answers. Like maybe if I looked hard enough, one of the gods would poke their smug face through and explain themselves. But of course, nothing happened.

“Why all these tests?” I growled, closing my eyes. I felt Ciera’s soft hand rest on my arm.

“They always test the ones they favor most,” she said gently.

“Then I wish they’d pick someone else to favor.”

She didn’t laugh. She just reached over and took my hand, her warmth seeping into my skin. “If Darren’s trial is anything like yours, then he’s being challenged, too. But if he’s strong and brave, then he will overcome it. I’m sure he’s fighting his way back to you.” Ciera smiled. “That’s what the gods want. For both of you to rise into what you’re meant to be.”

My mate was walking through hell, and I was being told to sit back and wait. Someone is drowning and I can’t jump in and save them. Ridiculous. Damn divine rules and interference.

I looked down at my stomach, at the slight curve that reminded me that the gods were also interested in my pup. Maybe that was what the gods were really watching—what would be born from this fire, what kind of pup would emerge from the storm.

The gods had set the game. Fine. Well, I’d make damn sure I won it.

Suddenly, a roar tore through the kingdom—deep, primal, and laced with a fury that chilled the very air. It wasn’t just a sound; it was a warning, a promise of blood. The kind of guttural, heart-wrenching growl only a lycan made when teetering on the razor’s edge of madness.

I froze for half a heartbeat as the earth seemed to tilt beneath me, the sheer force of it reverberating through the stones underfoot. The sky seemed to darken, clouds stirring as if the world itself recognized the danger. My heart stuttered, then launched into a frenzied rhythm. I knew that voice. I knew that pain. My body moved before thought could catch up. I surged to my feet, lightning humming beneath my skin, feet pounding against the ground as I sprinted toward the sound. My breath caught in my throat, tears already blurring my vision. He was here—he was alive and I needed to see him!